Woz Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 Just now, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Thats what I've heard and given how for the last 2 years I've struggled mightily to get decent sleep so while I know I'm not ready, I also haven't had a good nights sleep in years so its an easier transition for me instead of my wife who has been sleeping great since she was born except for the last few months The challenge for you then is to help hold your wife up. May she avoid post partum depression, but even if she does, the lack of sleep is going to do a number on her. And you really don't know what I mean by lack of sleep. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woz Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 Just now, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Everything else, I have no confidence in whatsoever lol Comes with the territory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 3 hours ago, JaguarCrazy2832 said: 37 weeks tomorrow so whenever she goes into labor they say they won't stop it... Good luck man. I'm 7 years older than my wife. We had our first child when I was 42. Our 2nd child we just had in April of last year. I'm now 49 and he turns 1 year old in 2 months. So I'll be 50 before he reaches 2. Be there for her and get some sleep as much as you can, when you can. Get EVERY relative you can think of that has ever had a baby or cared for one and get them to come over in the first 3-4 weeks ALOT! You will need to get some sleep (2 or 3 hours at a time is heaven!) and this is only accomplished if you have someone helping. We didn't do that with #1, but we have made liberal use of it with the #2 child. Oh, and don't worry about the house. And DON'T let her worry about it either. Your first priority is feeding and changing the baby and making sure it is taken care of. 2nd priority is momma's sleep. 3rd is your sleep. WAYYYYY down the list is housework. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 3 hours ago, Woz said: The challenge for you then is to help hold your wife up. May she avoid post partum depression, but even if she does, the lack of sleep is going to do a number on her. And you really don't know what I mean by lack of sleep. @JaguarCrazy2832I second this. The lack of sleep broke me. With both children, she breastfed them. The big thing for when my daughter was born over 7 years ago was that the baby would need to feed every 2 hours. And she did. She was hungry. EVERY.TWO.HOURS. But wait...there's more. Because the 2 hour clock doesn't start from the time the baby stops. It starts from when the baby starts. So if you're unlucky like we were with #1 child who at first took forever to feed (about 35-45 minutes at a time), then you're really only getting to sleep for about an hour at a time before you have to wake back up and change the baby and start the feed again. As @Woz said, you will know why the Geneva Convention considers sleep deprivation a form of torture. My friend Tony Deyo is a comedian (been on Conan and Tonight Show) and he has a joke called "Navy Seals". It's about how he explains being a new father to his non-parent comedian friends. But the kicker is that it goes by quicker than you think. I literally lost a whole month in almost a blink of an eye because it was just constantly wake up, change baby, give to mom, kinda sleep while baby is feeding, put baby back to bed, go to sleep for an hour, repeat... for 3-4 weeks. Then the baby starts sleeping 2-3 hours, then 4-6. Now my kid sleeps from 8pm until 5am and has for about 3 months. So it's gonna get better. Hang in there. And reach out if you need more advice. But get some sleep WHENEVER YOU CAN! EDIT: I see Woz already covered most of this (except the Tony Deyo comedy thing - which is VERY funny) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 On 2/10/2019 at 9:23 AM, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Is a diaper genie necessary? I feel like all we see is either emphatic YES or NO. Some say it doesnt work while others say it is the best thing ever We did for #1 kid. Waste of time and $$. Just throw it in the trash and take the trash out regularly. Easier than cleaning the genie out once a month. Quote Also did you guys have the baby sleep in a crib/basinet in your room? We've had 1 Dr tell us doing that helps prevent SIDS but another one says there is no data to support that. We're 5 weeks away from her due date, she had her shower yesterday so we are buying everything we need. Only thing we dont have or haven't ordered is the diaper genie and a basinet. We did for both. But we moved both right when they started pulling up on things. Because then they could get out of the bassinet. So my #2 kid just got moved recently to his own room in his big boy crib (which is my daughter's old room/old crib). We have 2 good video monitors on him and we make sure the room is not too warm and the air is moving in the room (fans at low speed but still moving air). This helps prevent pockets of non-moving air and pockets of CO2 forming. At least that is what I read at 3am 7 years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 On 12/5/2018 at 6:55 PM, JaguarCrazy2832 said: We will be buying diapers for sure i don’t know what that thing is you’re mentioning. I love the advice though thanks. I will show this too her soon. Thanks Woz Sorry I'm late to the party in terms of this thread. But my wife buys my son's diapers in bulk. She gets the "Mama Bear" brand diapers (literally JUST as good as Pampers/Huggies/etc...) from Amazon. We get 4 packs of 40 diapers each (so 160 total in one box at a time) and it comes out to like only 14-16 cents per diaper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaguarCrazy2832 Posted February 23, 2019 Author Share Posted February 23, 2019 9 hours ago, Thaiphoon said: Good luck man. I'm 7 years older than my wife. We had our first child when I was 42. Our 2nd child we just had in April of last year. I'm now 49 and he turns 1 year old in 2 months. So I'll be 50 before he reaches 2. Be there for her and get some sleep as much as you can, when you can. Get EVERY relative you can think of that has ever had a baby or cared for one and get them to come over in the first 3-4 weeks ALOT! You will need to get some sleep (2 or 3 hours at a time is heaven!) and this is only accomplished if you have someone helping. We didn't do that with #1, but we have made liberal use of it with the #2 child. Oh, and don't worry about the house. And DON'T let her worry about it either. Your first priority is feeding and changing the baby and making sure it is taken care of. 2nd priority is momma's sleep. 3rd is your sleep. WAYYYYY down the list is housework. Sadly we have little to no help early on. Her Mom had a heart attack and was in a coma for 2 months or so, she has some brain damage and requires care when her husband isn't home so he will be with her and my mom just had her 4th foot surgery so she cant drive and doesn't get around well and needs my dads help. Now my parents eventually will be able to help but not for a few months. We've had neighbors offer but we're new to the neighborhood and they seem nice but not exactly excited about having basically strangers in our house with our child while we're sleeping... Hopefully the nearby aunts/uncles can help Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaguarCrazy2832 Posted February 23, 2019 Author Share Posted February 23, 2019 9 hours ago, Thaiphoon said: We did for #1 kid. Waste of time and $$. Just throw it in the trash and take the trash out regularly. Easier than cleaning the genie out once a month. We did for both. But we moved both right when they started pulling up on things. Because then they could get out of the bassinet. So my #2 kid just got moved recently to his own room in his big boy crib (which is my daughter's old room/old crib). We have 2 good video monitors on him and we make sure the room is not too warm and the air is moving in the room (fans at low speed but still moving air). This helps prevent pockets of non-moving air and pockets of CO2 forming. At least that is what I read at 3am 7 years ago. So we basically got a diaper trashcan that helps prevent the smell(we'll see about that haha) but uses regular trash bags so at least we won't need to buy the special bags. Our house is usually kept pretty cold in the winter and warm in the summer so we'll definitely need to adjust it back to "normal people" temperatures for when he arrives. I feel like I've read something about having a fan on. Did you have the fan on while he slept in your room too? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaguarCrazy2832 Posted February 23, 2019 Author Share Posted February 23, 2019 9 hours ago, Thaiphoon said: Sorry I'm late to the party in terms of this thread. But my wife buys my son's diapers in bulk. She gets the "Mama Bear" brand diapers (literally JUST as good as Pampers/Huggies/etc...) from Amazon. We get 4 packs of 40 diapers each (so 160 total in one box at a time) and it comes out to like only 14-16 cents per diaper. Interesting...very interesting. I know diapers get to be ridiculously expensive but I assume buying in bulk is moreso for after their infant size, because they grow out of that so fast and places wont take returns on diapers apparently? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 6 hours ago, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Did you have the fan on while he slept in your room too? Yes, not only for him (and my daughter when she was an infant) but I also have to have the air moving in the room. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 6 hours ago, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Interesting...very interesting. I know diapers get to be ridiculously expensive but I assume buying in bulk is moreso for after their infant size, because they grow out of that so fast and places wont take returns on diapers apparently? Yup. You're correct. They will grow out of the N-sized ones quickly. My son is at the 3 sized ones now. If you have any extra of the smaller size once your child goes up a size, take them to a daycare or women's shelter. They could use them. But just realize that 160 diapers goes quick with infants. You're changing them once an hour (sometimes twice) and then as they get a bit older, every 2 hours like I am now. The only time I'm not checking his diaper every 2 hours is when he sleeps through the night. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thaiphoon Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 7 hours ago, JaguarCrazy2832 said: Sadly we have little to no help early on. Her Mom had a heart attack and was in a coma for 2 months or so, she has some brain damage and requires care when her husband isn't home so he will be with her and my mom just had her 4th foot surgery so she cant drive and doesn't get around well and needs my dads help. Now my parents eventually will be able to help but not for a few months. We've had neighbors offer but we're new to the neighborhood and they seem nice but not exactly excited about having basically strangers in our house with our child while we're sleeping... Hopefully the nearby aunts/uncles can help Yeah, use whomever you can/ It doesn't have to be crazy times. You can even get the baby clean, diapered, with a bottle, etc... Just if they are willing to come over and watch the baby while you get 2 hours of sleep 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mega Ron Posted February 23, 2019 Share Posted February 23, 2019 I know everyone's supposed to breastfeed now blah, blah, blah but formula does have big advantages. Especially if you don't have a support network. You can share the feeds so it's less demanding for your partner. The baby drinks more and sleeps for longer. It's much more convenient when you are out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scoundrel Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaguarCrazy2832 Posted February 24, 2019 Author Share Posted February 24, 2019 6 hours ago, Thaiphoon said: Yup. You're correct. They will grow out of the N-sized ones quickly. My son is at the 3 sized ones now. If you have any extra of the smaller size once your child goes up a size, take them to a daycare or women's shelter. They could use them. But just realize that 160 diapers goes quick with infants. You're changing them once an hour (sometimes twice) and then as they get a bit older, every 2 hours like I am now. The only time I'm not checking his diaper every 2 hours is when he sleeps through the night. I know they go super quick but I thought it was more like 10-12 diapers a day? Oops 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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