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Craziest (FF Appropriate) True Story in your profession Thread


MWil23

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*Disclaimer: You must have experienced this FIRST HAND*

I thought this would be fun to do, but I got to thinking the other day about the craziest true story that's happened in our profession.

As some of you know, I'm a teacher, so I'll post my top two:

A woman I worked with came into our teachers meeting embarrassed and shocked, as she had fraternal twin boys in her science class. She was teaching a lesson on genetics, when suddenly the twins smiled and raised their hands. She called on one, who blurted out: "Miss _____________, we have two different dads! Can you explain how this is possible?????". She then proceeded to tapdance around how, scientifically, that was possible within a 24-36 hour window. (Note: This mom was caught charging DOUBLE child support to each of the two dads, who both demanded a DNA Test.)

Last year, a 35 year old male came in to take his SAT. I must have given him a puzzled look, because he sighed and said, "I came in dead last in our fantasy football league. This is my punishment."

@ramssuperbowl99 @LETSGOBROWNIES @ET80

 

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Just now, MWil23 said:

Last year, a 35 year old male came in to take his SAT. I must have given him a puzzled look, because he sighed and said, "I came in dead last in our fantasy football league. This is my punishment."

Stealing this for next season.

Don't know how much I can mention in my line of work, but I'll think about it.

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Just now, ET80 said:

Stealing this for next season.

Don't know how much I can mention in my line of work, but I'll think about it.

He had to send his results straight to the commissioner for proof. It was hilarious.

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Not really crazy, but I volunteered at a kid's summer camp thing at an apartment complex where all of the residents could let there kids come hang out to do activities a couple years ago. One day one of the kids (about 10 years old), who was there infrequently, was eating chicken nuggets for lunch and went to toss his plate out with like 4 nuggets left (we couldn't save them for health purposes), and as he dumps them he says "Gotta save some for the Homeless". I didn't even realize what he meant at first but it caught up to me like 10 minutes later and I realized that he must've learned it from his parents or something. I'd never heard it before and it was so crazy to think of this 10 year old casually just dropping that line. Also, I was really hungry and wanted those damn nuggets.

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I’ve been cussed out by customers for other people’s mistakes, various other things that might be entertaining to talk about with a coworker but nothing really insane to talk about online. Well I guess there was one time a wedding guest upstairs tried taking the stairs and was plastered and she fell all the way down. Was very awkward and she was unconscious for 15 mins. Came in the next day and learned she didn’t die which is cool

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4 minutes ago, Tyty said:

I’ve been cussed out by customers for other people’s mistakes, various other things that might be entertaining to talk about with a coworker but nothing really insane to talk about online. Well I guess there was one time a wedding guest upstairs tried taking the stairs and was plastered and she fell all the way down. Was very awkward and she was unconscious for 15 mins. Came in the next day and learned she didn’t die which is cool

Be honest. You pushed her. It was your first divorce attempt. 

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Hmmm it sounds crazier on paper but I saw a US Marshal 'team' execute a search warrant and make a high-value arrest, they drove up in like 5 SUVs like it was a war zone, surrounded the building with dogs and long rifles and asked me if I'd rather give them the key or let them use the door-busting device (whatever it's called) ^_^

Funnily enough it took them like 20 minutes to "secure" the building from the outside, covering all the exits, they were shouting back and forth the whole time just loud as hell, and when they pulled the guy out of the apartment he was dead asleep and just waking up (it was like 2pm). A REAL CRIMINAL MASTERMIND

 

I heard a woman in her death throes having like a seizure or something, I never found out exactly what was going on with her

 

I found a dead body on a sofa once, the color surprised me a bit, it was a day or three old

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21 minutes ago, cddolphin said:

Hmmm it sounds crazier on paper but I saw a US Marshal 'team' execute a search warrant and make a high-value arrest, they drove up in like 5 SUVs like it was a war zone, surrounded the building with dogs and long rifles and asked me if I'd rather give them the key or let them use the door-busting device (whatever it's called) ^_^

Funnily enough it took them like 20 minutes to "secure" the building from the outside, covering all the exits, they were shouting back and forth the whole time just loud as hell, and when they pulled the guy out of the apartment he was dead asleep and just waking up (it was like 2pm). A REAL CRIMINAL MASTERMIND

 

I heard a woman in her death throes having like a seizure or something, I never found out exactly what was going on with her

 

I found a dead body on a sofa once, the color surprised me a bit, it was a day or three old

I have so many questions. But first.... WTF do you do?

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1 hour ago, Matts4313 said:

I have so many questions. But first.... WTF do you do?

I'm a regional properties manager for a foreign owner who lives overseas, so I bounce between several different multi-family housing complexes everyday, whenever something particularly j00cy or stressful comes up I get a call from the site manager and I usually have to rush over. When you have close to a thousand occupied doors there is bound to be crazies / druggies or drug dealers / domestic issues / assaults etc. My boss also acquires... let's call them "distressed" properties, so oftentimes the first couple years are rough while the renovations (cough cough gentrification) are happening.

I have one in particular I left out because I didn't technically 'witness' it, but had to deal with the fallout for months, it's also kind of a gross story and NSFW.

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