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Idiocracy Mafia, Powered by Brawndo: Town lived up to the name, Mafia won.


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In 2005, U.S. Army librarian Corporal Joe Bauers is selected for a suspended animation experiment as the "most average" individual in the entire armed forces. Lacking a suitable female candidate, the military hires a prostitute named Rita, and bribes her pimp Upgrayedd. When the officer in charge is arrested for running his own prostitution ring under Upgrayedd's tutelage, the experiment is forgotten. Over the next five centuries, societal expectations lead the most intelligent humans to choose not to have children while the least intelligent reproduce indiscriminately, creating increasingly dumber generations.

In 2505, Joe and Rita's suspension chambers are unearthed by the collapse of a mountain-sized garbage pile; Joe's chamber crashes into the apartment of Frito Pendejo. Wandering what was once Washington, D.C., Joe is faced with a population that has become profoundly anti-intellectual, speaking only low registers of English and wallowing in overconsumption and crass popular entertainment. Their technology is advanced but often malfunctioning, driven by garish commercialism. Believing that he is hallucinating after only a year of hibernation, Joe enters a hospital and realizes the truth. He is arrested for not having a bar code tattoo to pay for his doctor's appointment, and is sent to prison after being assigned the grossly incompetent Pendejo as his lawyer.

Rita also escapes her chamber and resumes work as a prostitute, but soon realizes that people have become so stupid that she can charge customers money without actual services. Joe is renamed "Not Sure" by a faulty speech-recognition tattooing machine and takes a rudimentary IQ test, then tricks a guard by claiming that he is meant to be released, and simply walks out the door. He finds Frito, who reveals that a time machine exists to return him to 2005, and Joe bribes him with promises of riches through compound interest on a bank account he will open for Frito in the 21st century. Leading Joe and Rita to the time machine, Frito takes them into a gigantic Costco store, where Joe is identified by a tattoo scanner and apprehended.

Taken to the White House, Joe is appointed Secretary of the Interior, as the IQ test identified him as the most intelligent person alive. President Camacho introduces Joe to the legislative body, and gives him the impossible job of fixing the nationwide food shortages, dust bowls, and crippled economy within a week. Joe discovers that the nation's crops are irrigated with Brawndo, a "thirst mutilator" whose parent corporation purchased the FDA, FCC, and USDA. When Joe has the irrigation system replaced with water drawn from toilets, Brawndo's stock drops to zero and half of the population lose their jobs, causing mass riots.

Joe is sentenced to die in a monster truck demolition derby featuring undefeated "rehabilitation officer" Beef Supreme. However, Beef's oversized vehicle is crushed trying to enter the arena, and Joe manages to defeat the other vehicles. Rita and Frito discover that Joe's reintroduction of water to the soil has allowed vegetation to grow. They arrange for the sprouting crops to be shown on the stadium's Jumbotron, prompting Camacho to give Joe a presidential pardon. Joe and Rita decide to stay in the future, though discover they had no choice as the "time masheen" Frito mentioned is merely a childishly inaccurate history-themed amusement ride. Following Camacho's term, Joe is elected president and marries Rita. They conceive the world's three smartest children, while new Vice President Frito takes eight wives and fathers thirty-two of the world's stupidest children. In a post-credits scene, Upgrayedd awakens from his own suspension chamber and sets off in search of Rita.

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Edited by Matts4313
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ORDER OF EVENTS:

All moves happen at the same time and will be decided by "Natural Resolution"

In case of conflict, moves will be determined by:

1. Other

2. Scum

3. Civ

 

Rules for this game 

0. Read all the rules. 

1. Stay active. Failure to vote for two consecutive days will result in death. Plain and simple. <== Failure to post within 24 hours will also be considered a death penalty. So if you don't post or vote, you will potentially be replaced or killed. I also reserve the right to replace anyone whom I deem inactive; such as a special missing their moves, not reading/responding to PMs, etc. They will be warned. 


2. No talking during Nighttime. I will give a small grace period in case you are typing something out, but just don't risk it. Anything I deem to be posted after a reasonable time will be punished as I see fit.  JK, I dont care if you talk during night.

3. Once you die, you are allowed to have one multiple zombie posts (within reason). Don't post ANYTHING to do with gameplay. Bad things will happen to your team if you try to pull any shenanigans. That includes, but is not limited to dropping hints in other thread, sending PMs to other teammates, and chat/discord. 

4. Don't edit or delete posts. Insta-death and your team will suffer. <== Scratch that, You can edit or delete, but be forewarned that if it messes with the VC, I will likely punish people. Dont change your vote through an edit.

5. Players cannot have game related communication with others through any medium other than this thread unless you are specifically allowed to. This includes, but is not limited to other thread, PMs or other chats. Or real life you dirty scumsuckers. 

6. In case of a tie there will be a 15 minute OT period. If it is still a tie, Governor will choose who he wants to be lynched. There can be a multi-lynch. Governor must be around to use the multi-lynch, otherwise a random.org will decide who dies. 

7. I will not accept any votes if they aren't bolded. No exceptions. 

8. Once the voting cutoff time comes, all votes are frozen. No other votes will be counted after this time. If the cutoff time ends at :00, voted marked :00 will be counted, votes marked :01 will not be counted. *EVEN IF I AM NOT HERE TO CALL NIGHT* 

9. If you believe I have made a mistake, or have been unfair, you're wrong. 

10. Don't post PMs. No exceptions. Think of it as plagiarism, even if you slightly alter my words, it's still against the rules. If you aren't sure, PM me. 

11. The host will always make a mistake, if you see one, please revert to rule #9 and after that PM me. 

12. Keeping an updated vote count will make me happy. 

13. Have fun, this is a game. 

Beginners Link to Mafia: http://wiki.mafiascum.net/index.php?title=Newbie_Guide

Edited by Matts4313
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Sign Up:

  1. @MWil23 - Bobby and the Assblaster - N1 Killed - Town
  2. @Woz - Secretary of Education - N1 Lynch - Town
  3. @The Orca - Clevon - N2 Lynch - Town => Revived D3
  4. @Pickle Rick - Upgrayyed - Killed N1 - Other 
  5. @squire12
  6. @Daniel
  7. @TheKillerNacho - Secretary of State - Town
  8. @bigbadbuff - Secretary of Energy - Town
  9. @swoosh - Attorney General Funbags - Killed N3 - Town
  10. @Hockey5djh
  11. @bcb1213
  12. @Glen => Replaced by Mwil
  13. @JoshstraDaymus - Joe - Mafia
  14. @Daboyle - Trevor - Day 3 Hit - Mafia 
  15. @Counselor => Replaced by Pickle - Vinny and the Dildozer - Town
  16. @Malfatron
  17. @ET80 => Replaced by Swag - Dumb Citizen - Town

 

Night Links:

Start of Game

N1 - Woz Lynched

Money/Prizes

N2 - Orca Lynch

Rule Amendment

N3 - TKN Pardoned

N4 - Josh lynched

N5 BBB Lynched

 

 

Edited by Matts4313
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14 minutes ago, Counselor said:

Never seen this 

Its worth a watch. Pretty sure its on HBO and Netflix. By the same dude who wrote Office Space/Silicon Valley/King of the Hill/Bevis and Butthead. 

You in?

9 minutes ago, Nazgul said:

I will not be participating.

Thats a dumb thing to say, even in Idiocracy mafia. 

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So I am rewatching the movie and forgot how many times they describe Luke Wilson as a homophobic slur. I am trying to think of a less offensive word to use for write ups. @SwAg use that big brain and give me a more politically correct word to use, please.

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