biggie. Posted July 30, 2022 Share Posted July 30, 2022 Customer: How long will the pizza be? Server: Erm, what? It'll be round. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TOUCAN Posted July 30, 2022 Share Posted July 30, 2022 I got into an argument while hanging out in the sporting goods store. It was in tents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonStark Posted July 30, 2022 Share Posted July 30, 2022 What's the difference between people from Dubai and people from Abu Dhabi? People from Dubai don't like the Flintstones and people from Abu Dhabi do. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggie. Posted July 31, 2022 Author Share Posted July 31, 2022 My aunt's astrology sign is Cancer and she had a very ironic death. Oh I'm terribly sorry to hear that! Yeah, she did not expect to be crushed by a giant crab. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnChimpo Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 Why did the space rock taste better than the earth rock? It was a little meteor. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel Posted August 2, 2022 Share Posted August 2, 2022 This one requires familiarity with The Odyssey, but is a dad joke through and through. Who does Polyphemus hate even more than Odysseus? Nobody. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seminoles1 Posted August 3, 2022 Share Posted August 3, 2022 Did you know that garbage men don't get any training before starting the job? Yeah, it's crazy. They just pick things up along the way. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ty21 Posted August 4, 2022 Share Posted August 4, 2022 I’m the ringleader but everyone at work tells dad jokes. I don’t find them funny but watching the pain in peoples face having to hear it makes it worth it. What’s orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ty21 Posted August 4, 2022 Share Posted August 4, 2022 The Norm MacDonald frog gets a loan joke is the longest joke I’ve ever told someone. It’s stressful to even tell it. “A frog walks into a small bank called Wack's and approaches the owner, Patricia. He says, "Hi, Patricia, my name is Ken Jagger, I'd like to take out a loan." Patricia say, "Please, call me Patty. You wouldn't happen to be related to Mick Jagger would you?" Ken responds, "Yes he's my father." So Patricia tells him, "Well, if you want to take out a loan with us you'll need some collateral." And Ken pulls out a little figurine of a dog playing with a ball and places it on the counter. Patricia inspects the figurine for awhile and is a bit confused. So she calls over a fellow employee to help sort it out. Patricia tells the other employee, "This is Ken Jagger, he wanted to take out a loan and offered this as collateral, but I'm not sure what it is." The other employee inspects the figurine for a few seconds and says, "It's a knick-knack Patty Wack, give the frog a loan! His old man's a Rolling Stone!"” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seminoles1 Posted August 4, 2022 Share Posted August 4, 2022 Why did Tigger get his head stuck in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daniel Posted August 4, 2022 Share Posted August 4, 2022 How do you turn a duck into an R&B singer? Just throw it into the water until its bill withers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TOUCAN Posted August 4, 2022 Share Posted August 4, 2022 I put a picture of my wife in my wallet to remind myself why I don't have any money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ET80 Posted August 5, 2022 Share Posted August 5, 2022 Horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks “why the long face?” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biggie. Posted August 5, 2022 Author Share Posted August 5, 2022 49 minutes ago, ET80 said: Horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks “why the long face?” We're telling dad jokes, not grandpa jokes. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beekay414 Posted August 6, 2022 Share Posted August 6, 2022 Why did the Norwegian Navy have bar codes on their ships? So when they arrived to port, they could Scandinavian. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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