Daboyle Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 1 minute ago, Malfatron said: ### Wattsville Waste Walruses (8-5) vs. Burlington Sock Puppets (10-3) **Wrestler comparison:** - **Wattsville Waste Walruses**: Mankind (chaotic, hardcore, but finding ways to win) - **Burlington Sock Puppets**: Bret Hart (consistent, technical, and currently dominant) **Winner**: **Burlington Sock Puppets** - **How**: The Sock Puppets win with a technical submission, like Bret Hart locking in the Sharpshooter. The Walruses bring their chaotic energy, but Burlington’s discipline and superior record give them the edge in a clean, tactical win. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 (edited) 7 minutes ago, Malfatron said: - **Cambodia Humanoids**:capable of solid performances Edited September 12 by Malfatron 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 8 minutes ago, Malfatron said: ## Anchorage Quill Pigs (6-7) vs. Lake Minnewanka Ice Orcas (9-4) **Wrestler comparison:** - **Anchorage Quill Pigs**: Cactus Jack (hardcore and unpredictable but struggling for consistency) - **Lake Minnewanka Ice Orcas**: Kevin Nash (big, strong, methodical, and successful this season) **Winner**: **Lake Minnewanka Ice Orcas** - **How**: Nash-style "Jackknife Powerbomb." The Quill Pigs throw everything at the Ice Orcas, but the latter’s consistent strength and tactical approach prove too much. The Orcas methodically grind down the Quill Pigs for a dominant win. Beaten with their own move. What a jobber Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daboyle Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 On 8/26/2024 at 5:27 PM, LAOJoe said: Ya. I got invited to go golfing Sunday twilight time and when I got home it was late and I was tired. I was expecting to get it done yesterday evening as I had a busy Saturday but an empty Sunday. You gonna post these power rankings at some point? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 5 minutes ago, Daboyle said: You gonna post these power rankings at some point? Im noticing the power rankings become less frequent the worse joes record gets 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 Hahaha. My record was planned to be bad from an early point but I was actually going to put one up tonight. Should be up in the AM. I should have done it during the long break we just had but it slipped my mind. Just a whole lot of busy and then a whole lot of forgetting since I haven't done it in a while. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daboyle Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 36 minutes ago, LAOJoe said: Hahaha. My record was planned to be bad from an early point but I was actually going to put one up tonight. Should be up in the AM. I should have done it during the long break we just had but it slipped my mind. Just a whole lot of busy and then a whole lot of forgetting since I haven't done it in a while. Calling it now he’s never gonna post his power rankings lmao 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 15 minutes ago, Daboyle said: Calling it now he’s never gonna post his power rankings lmao It's coming along like Shannon Sharpe's girl. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Ramster Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 @TheKillerNacho Plz cut Kris Jenkins and add Jonathan Cooper, Denver. Thank you Babe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 It's coming. Also @TheKillerNacho I discovered that Burlington has clinched the playoffs. It's simple. Only team on the outside that can catch them is Cambodia. Cambodia has lost the tiebreaker and even if they win the division, Little Rock would be behind them on conference record anyways. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 You also missed that the Ducks are out although I'm certain that one was just an error in editing it. 8 teams left to go in the rankings. The reason I didn't do it is because if I can't do it well I don't really like to do it at all too often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 (edited) Week 14 Power Rankings: 1. Indianapolis Predators (11-2) - They are indisputably the best team in their conference once again. Their stats are ridiculous on both sides of the ball. Actually you know what? Replace what I say about Burlington and insert Indianapolis and their respective players and it's eerily similar except that Indianapolis was expected to be good and are a bit deeper. The Predators were the first team to have clinched the playoffs. 2. Burlington Sock Puppets (10-3) - Burlington doesn't do blowouts often but sock puppets are meant for entertaining and that is what they do. I was right that their defense seemed to improve and is dominant but I was completely wrong in thinking their offense was stagnant and missing an X-factor. Travis Kelce became the X-factor while Jordan Love and Raheem Mostart have been better than expected. Their defense has been the 2nd best unit in the league overall and, with an improved offense, that helps in the margins. It's no surprise that games are close, but neither is it that they are consistently winning them and that they have the 2nd highest net points at 50. The Sock Puppets have actually already clinched the playoffs. This is because they already own the conference record tiebreaker over Little Rock and they own the tiebreaker over Cambodia. 2 teams can't pass them in the wild card because they only lose the tiebreaker to Tokyo. They are guaranteed to be ahead of at least one of Cambodia or Little Rock. 3. Rio de Janeiro Pirates (8-5) - Rio is ranked 3rd above Cincy mainly because of last week's results and the H2H result earlier in the season but the stats seem to show that the Pirates may not be as good as a few teams ranked below them. It's definitely a weird feeling but I think that may have to do with the overall quality of their opponents. Their record and scheduling puts them in prime position to make the playoffs but a loss could easily eliminate them thanks to their lost tiebreaker to Cambodia. We'll look into their scenarios more in depth the following week. 4. Cincinnati Buffleheads (8-4-1) - The Quack Bowl is looking to be the ultimate trap game before key games vs Wattsville and Indianapolis that could be for the division and conference. These ducks are elite and are looking like the Predators' biggest obstacle to returning to the Taco Bowl. 5. Lake Minnewanka Ice Orcas (9-4) - It is remarkable that a team that was thought to have to be carried by their defense is actually only doing decently there and is actually being carried by their offense led by Geno Smith. Converting on 4th down at a high clip might have helped have them get a couple wins. They are efficient and I don't know how good they actually are but they are solid. They are not quite locked into the playoffs yet but it feels inevitable. 6. Little Rock Uni Royals (9-4) - The reigning champs are still elite; make no mistake. Cracks are starting to show though with repeated losses vs elite teams including two big losses in the past two weeks that turned their foregone division title into an uncertainty. The only way a win doesn't clinch them a playoff berth this week is if Cambodia also wins. There is a scenario where the Royals lose their last games, Cambodia wins out and Tokyo wins exactly 2 games where a 3-way tie is created. Cambodia would win the division and Tokyo would finish ahead of Little Rock. In this scenario Little Rock would be eliminated if Rio got to 10 or more wins. 7. Cambodia Humanoids (7-6) - The Humanoids almost their own destiny as long as Tokyo or Rio lose a game. A 2-way tie with Little Rock would come down to net points if the Royals lose to a Tokyo team that wins out. The win over the Pirates also helps their chances. 8. Tokyo Shoguns (8-5) - The loss to Cambodia was big and they need to be careful now because one single loss could mean the end of their season. They could easily enter the last week of the season in a situation where a win gets them the division and a loss has them eliminated. 9. Wattsville Waste Walruses (8-5) - The Walruses round out our very good looking teams. They have the 4th highest net points in the league and have the highest rated offense but they are all the way down at 9 because they do not have a win vs any of the teams above them. Maybe the stats and results are slightly inflated. Their win over the Blobfish and their sweep of the Ents (although tiebreakers may not matter there) have got them sitting pretty for now but their loss to Freiburg may come back to haunt them if they don't close out strong. They get to prove themselves right away as their two toguhest games on their entire schedule are next as they go on the road vs Burlington and Cincinnati. 10. Freiburg Venom (6-7) - Freiburg don't have a great record but they have a not-impossible playoff opportunity thanks to their division record and win vs Wattsville. They are big Predators fans the next 2 weeks as they may need the Ents and Orcas to lose. 11. New Zealand Blobfish (7-6) - New Zealand just lost a huge game to the Ice Orcas but they are still in it with a decent chance. They need the Orcas to lose their last 2 games and can possibly even afford a loss before the final week as long as the Orcas lose this week. But that would invite the Ents or Venom to leapfrog them in the standings. 12. Anchorage Quill Pigs (6-7) - Surprisingly Anchorage is not dead yet and they also have a couple not-impossible paths to the playoffs. The first important key is that they control their path to 3rd in the division because they still play Cambodia with a chance to sweep. The other big point is that they beat Rio. If they were 7-6 it would seem like good odds but as it is they need to almost certainly win out and get help. Things will be clearer one way or another next week. 13. Okoboji Ents (6-6-1) - Okoboji have the schedule to make a playoff push. They have a very tough game this week against the Predators but they finish off vs 2 of the weaker teams in the league. It is not impossible to see the Orcas or Waste Walruses lose 2 times. They could even lose once and we could see them have a chance if Wattsville loses out. It's not likely but the Walrus schedule isn't the easiest. Their most realistic path at the moment is to win out, have Wattsville lose 2 and have New Zealand lose a game. Their other plausible but tougher path is if they lose one but Wattsville loses out while New Zealand loses 2 and Frieburg loses 1. 14. Reykjavik Direwolves (6-7) - The Direwolves are somehow in it still and it may be thanks to their insane turnover differential. If they tie the Pirates in the standings then they would finish ahead of them. They do however lose head to head tiebreakers to all 3 of Little Rock, Tokyo and Cambodia thanks to starting the season 0-3 vs them so their chances are essentially down to winning out while hoping 2 of the following 3 events happen: Rio lose 2, Cambodia lose 2, Tokyo lose 3. The problem is that Rio may have the easiest remaining schedule. 15. Hanoi Viet Kongs (5-8) - They have a chance to sweep Rio so they are still in the hunt to finish 2nd in the division but that will most definitely not happen. They do actually still have a very minor chance though. They lost to Tokyo and Anchorage, however they did beat Cambodia. If Hanoi can find themselves in 3rd in the division at 8-8 and Cambodia can find themselves in 2nd at 8-8 then Hanoi will make the playoffs. So to have a chance they need to win out and have Rio or Tokyo lose out while Cambodia finishes at 8-8 or worse. They still need to watch out for the Direwolves and Quill Pigs though. I expect them to be eliminated this week but if they are still alive, then we'll explore their chances even deeper. 16. Tombstone Outlaws (5-8) - Holy **** you mean Tombstone is still alive? Let's do some quick math. If they win out and Wattsville loses out then they split the series and both are 4-4 in the division and 6-6 in the conference. It then comes down to net points. 65 points separates them with 3 games to go. IRL it's possible but it isn't happening in the NSFL. They would also finish last in a 3-way involving the 7-7-2 Ents. The Outlaws are just waiting to officially be eliminated and oddly enough I could see it not happening until after the final week. 17. Lancaster Fighting Amish (4-9) - Lancaster is actually 3-3 in their last 6 games and they've separated themselves from the bottom of the rankings despite losing to Hamilton. They have chances to play spoiler and could see themselves moving up (or down) another couple spots. 18. Hamilton Hornets (2-11) - Hamilton might have a few more wins if they started a RB at RB. That is the sole reason they aren't 19 or 20 right now. Will they play spoiler this week when Rio comes to the Hammer? 19. Phoenix Rubber Ducks (3-10) - Hopes were high when they traded for Ja'Marr Chase and revamped their offense but they have the worst defense in the league. They've made some moves and they are setting up to have a solid re-revamped offense next season. 20. Egypt Starfalls (1-12) - Their lone win was vs Hamilton so they could easily be above them but the teams above beat teams with a pulse and Egypt does have the worst record so they stay here for now but that doesn't meant they'll finish there. GOTW Wattsville Waste Walruses @ Burlington Sock Puppets (SNF) National TV: New Zealand Blobfish @ Little Rock Uni Royals (MNF) Cambodia Humanoids @ Freiburg Venom (Sunday Late) Cincinnati Buffleheads @ Phoenix Rubber Ducks (Sunday Early) Rio de Janeiro Pirates @ Hamilton Hornets (TNF) Rest of WEEK 14 (Fri, September 13) Egypt Starfalls @ Tokyo Shoguns Indianapolis Predators @ Okoboji Ents Hanoi Viet Kongs @ Tombstone Outlaws Reykjavík Direwolves @ Lancaster Fighting Amish Anchorage Quill Pigs @ Lake Minnewanka Ice Orcas (UOTW) Edited Saturday at 07:17 PM by LAOJoe 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bcb1213 Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 just an fyi, Little Rock can't clinch the division this week no matter what happens, not sure why you think otherwise Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LAOJoe Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 1 minute ago, bcb1213 said: just an fyi, Little Rock can't clinch the division this week no matter what happens, not sure why you think otherwise I never said that. Read again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bcb1213 Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 (edited) smooth edit...lol Edited September 12 by bcb1213 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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