Malfatron Posted October 12, 2019 Author Share Posted October 12, 2019 If finn didnt make it to the finals, he would be a shoe-in for Americas Favorite Players these DR sessions speak for themselves Hes the Jack Keroak of Big Brother interesting to have a look into the mans brain On 9/23/2019 at 4:15 PM, FinneasGage said: Diary 7: September 23 5:16pm Nobody remaining in the game is worthy of trust, so I'm operating solo at this point. Earlier, Flux was responsible for getting Pickle removed, who's a guy I'd previously mentioned would be of great benefit to me if he remained in the game. He was one of the few guys that was behaving as expected and trying to overcome his previous offenses. So that was enough for me to cut ties w/ Flux, because I still suspect he was the rouge vote that I'd accused him of being a couple weeks ago. So I stopped responding to messages/communicating with him. At that point, it was me and outpost against the world in my eyes. Then he won HoH and did a no no. The numbers are getting tight at this point and it became apparent outpost was using me and likely keeping me around w/ his faux loyalty to get an easy vote from me to win. He wasn't really about the cause. I told him we were done. He's since tried to convince me that he's done all these things for me and painting me as a bad guy for no longer being his ally. This is something snakes love to do it seems. Also ignoring the **** I've done to keep him around. A lot of people wanted him out of the game very early on and I'm not sure if he's aware of that. I act irrationally and make moves daily that are counterproductive to forming relationships and winning this game. It's never been about winning. It was about playing a game based on previously established principles and seeing how far that would even get me. I'm not playing a pure game, a large part of my game is rooted in emotional manipulation that's proven to be much harder to execute online than in reality. That's all failed me. I've lost my touch. And I understand my hypocritical behavior, but it won't ever stop me from cutting ties/burning bridges when others operate snakily. That's a weak feminine trait, but I carry that with me. My lone "ally" is nazgul who I've told I'll do everything I can to see him win the game. He's the only person playing that I can't ever recall lying. So that's my aim at this point. To get to the end with Nazgul. I suspect outpost will nom as the replacement, which if that's the case I'll probably be voted out. I could've easily righted the ship as he's reached via PM, but I'm not going to steer it back to safety. What's done is done. So this veto is pivotal to my survival. On 9/26/2019 at 5:09 PM, FinneasGage said: Diary 8: September 26 6:10pm I wasn't anticipating surviving that eviction. After I went up, Flux came to me and told me that he'd vote to save me if I had the numbers. I told him Nazgul was voting to save me. We agreed upon a final 3. And alas... I'm still here. I don't trust either of them really. Even after our agreement prior to me being nominated, Nazgul was on the fence about voting touch out. His indecisiveness has made him someone I can't trust. I've told Outpost straight up that I'm no longer affiliated with him and am no longer concerned with protecting/aiding him in any capacity. Me and ET have been relatively friendly, but we've never really been friends this game. It's me, flux and naz VS. outpost and ET. I wouldn't be surprised if that's not the reality. Honestly I'd be surprised if both Flux and naz were being truthful. I lost this HoH by going all in after a hot start in black jack and inevitably my luck running out the second I got ballsy. I won't have the privilege of nom'ing Outpost and ET. It's going to be very interesting if Outpost or ET win. In that event, my game likely ends. I wouldn't be disappointed. I feel satisfied with what I've brought to this season. At this point, I feel like Outpost has played the strongest game. If he get's to the end, he has my vote. After him it's probably ET. Then Flux. Then Nazgul. If I wasn't like how I am, outpost is sitting very comfortably and probably coasting to an easy win honestly. He knew my principles though. I think it was his only misstep. I'm rooting for him tbh. But in the event that flux or Naz win this and nom him... I have to vote him out. On 9/28/2019 at 5:36 AM, FinneasGage said: Diary 9: September 28 6:30am outpost and myself are in the midst of a quarrel. although i've explained on multiple occasions his omission of mentioning prominent allegiances he was working with was something i consider operating snakily, he doesn't understand why I announced to him that i longer had confidence in working with him. regardless of what's transpired, when i reached out to outpost when the game began, i was anticipating working with a much different style of player. he's played a "peoples" game. no feather ruffling. no trademarks. i do have to think about whether this season will even matter if nazgul or flux win. they've been as low key as it gets. i've lost all my friends this season. i've become a villain. i keep forgetting and switching what "principles" i'm even playing with. my levels of sobriety heavily influences my overall idea for what i'm even looking to accomplish by participating. at the moment the levels are low and i'm not sure what i'm talking about anymore. i just reread, i was getting to the point that since i longer have anyone i'm dedicated to getting to the end and the two people i am associated with haven't done a lot for the ratings and even been aggressively passive on that front. i think for the sake of the people i need to get the end now. i believe most in the jury are no longer fans of the fin or were never fans in the first place. i believe most that participated that didn't make the jury are also not in the fan club. maybe i'm not a good guy. maybe i am the bad guy. maybe it's time to embrace the fact that i'm not a good guy. if i'm the heel, who's my face-foil? flux is probably the most face, but do the people care? i think the real story at this point is me and outpost. despite the fact he's not been brash like i was expecting, he's probably the best ratings guy this point. aside from mission, he's probably the most mad anyone's ever been at me online. it was never my intention and just reactionary to things that occurred, but the finale would be intense. i'm going to try and ensure ET goes home. from there we'll see what happens. a finale of myself and outpost seems like an ideal ending to this. going against anyone else in the finale would be a disservice to the season. i'm not working with him. and am not telling him. but i think i just realized what i need to do. nazgul has told me that if either outpost or ET earns veto that flux is going up as the replacement. so we'll see what happens. nothing that occurs from now until the end of the game would be a surprise to me. On 9/28/2019 at 5:53 AM, FinneasGage said: Diary 9: September 28 6:30am outpost and myself are in the midst of a quarrel. although i've explained on multiple occasions his omission of mentioning prominent allegiances he was working with was something i consider operating snakily, he doesn't understand why I announced to him that i longer had confidence in working with him. regardless of what's transpired, when i reached out to outpost when the game began, i was anticipating working with a much different style of player. he's played a "peoples" game. no feather ruffling. no trademarks. i do have to think about whether this season will even matter if nazgul or flux win. they've been as low key as it gets. i've lost all my friends this season. i've become a villain. i keep forgetting and switching what "principles" i'm even playing with. my levels of sobriety heavily influences my overall idea for what i'm even looking to accomplish by participating. at the moment the levels are low and i'm not sure what i'm talking about anymore. i just reread, i was getting to the point that since i longer have anyone i'm dedicated to getting to the end and the two people i am associated with haven't done a lot for the ratings and even been aggressively passive on that front. i think for the sake of the people i need to get the end now. i believe most in the jury are no longer fans of the fin or were never fans in the first place. i believe most that participated that didn't make the jury are also not in the fan club. maybe i'm not a good guy. maybe i am the bad guy. maybe it's time to embrace the fact that i'm not a good guy. if i'm the heel, who's my face-foil? flux is probably the most face, but do the people care? i think the real story at this point is me and outpost. despite the fact he's not been brash like i was expecting, he's probably the best ratings guy this point. aside from mission, he's probably the most mad anyone's ever been at me online. it was never my intention and just reactionary to things that occurred, but the finale would be intense. i'm going to try and ensure ET goes home. from there we'll see what happens. a finale of myself and outpost seems like an ideal ending to this. going against anyone else in the finale would be a disservice to the season. i'm not working with him. and am not telling him. but i think i just realized what i need to do. nazgul has told me that if either outpost or ET earns veto that flux is going up as the replacement. so we'll see what happens. nothing that occurs from now until the end of the game would be a surprise to me. On 9/30/2019 at 10:47 PM, FinneasGage said: Diary 10: September 30 11:47pm outpost's pm's did not slow down. i eventually caved and told him of my recently developed desire to go to the finale with him. i didn't want to tell him that it was of my belief that the two of us competing in the finale is what needed to happen. it's not my intention to "smooth things out." since i've done that, he's been friendly and that behavior has even extended over into other sub-forums. it seems contrived. like he's trying to control my "emotions". it obviously comes off as insincere after hurling insults for a week. it needs to be us in the finale. me and flux have never had issues on this site. me and nazgul have always been friendly. it's unfortunate that the public didn't see the extent of how it got between me and outpost via dm's. it would definitely add a lot to the finale. i think flux needs to be evicted next. it's hard to say that, because i'm starting to believe i've had the wrong impression of him. ET's send-off post where he mentioned flux's refusal to communicate with him in regards to touch and myself's nomination was surprising. i didn't know his loyalty was that strong. he's a beautiful guy. i'm probably too trigger-happy when it comes to dismissing guys of being snakes. flux has been one of my favorite guys on this site for like the past 7 years. some guys on this site are just absolute studs when it comes to creating a community atmosphere and he's always epitomized that. it's really the only benefit that forums still have over social media like twitter and ****. it's guys like him that make me come to this site. i'm not sure how a majority of the jury would perceive me and my game. it's no slight to them in saying the majority come off as nonlateral thinkers who don't pick up on intention and my rationale for doing certain things. or they're so invested in the game that maybe they overlook the bigger picture as they're solely focused on getting to the end of the game. mission, tlo and probably touch would certainly vote for whoever i'm against. me and ET had a weird thing for years where he would miss the intention/sarcasm of things i was doing and then be (what i perceived as) snobby in a way that didn't even really encourage good banter. so it made it hard to ever really become cool with him, but that's really kind of turned a corner in the past year or so. we're wired oppositely, but i think we both have a level of respect (for lack of better word) to where we'd crown the deserving guy the winner. he's definitely a guy that i probably had an incorrect perception of for a long time... he's a good guy. i have no idea how he'd vote though. probably not in my favor. i think pickle would vote my way. i don't know. it'll be interesting. regardless of what happens in the finale, i'm happy with myself or outpost winning this. outpost has put in work. even though it hasn't been for the sake of ratings most of the time. if i wanted to win this, i would definitely bring nazgul to the finale. it's interesting that last time i got to the final 2 i brought schrute with me, who i recognized as the most worthy guy to bring and he took home the trophy. now i could bring his twin and probably get a win, but i'm once again going to take the most deserving guy and probably lose again. you have to stick to your principles. even though i'm not sure what they are. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight_Schrute Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 Just now, Outpost31 said: @Nazgul, diary entry with proof that I can see your perspective. You’re not getting MY perspective, which is the firm belief that if you piss off the jury with late betrayals, you will not win. It’s not you, it’s your late game decisions. Everybody understands that. You're only hating because the late game decision went against you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrenaline_Flux Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 1 minute ago, Pickle Rick said: You really had to work to make it to then end being an in your face player and driving the ratings. In the end I just loved finn's playingstyle more and thought he had to work harder as well as play better to make it to the end. Funny enough, a huge stickler in my decision is that as much as this was true in the first half of the game, I really felt he faltered in the jury phase where everyone besides ET was basically competing to take him to F2 and he actively pushed away almost everyone. He unnecessarily made it harder for himself to get to the end. Thankfully for him though, he still did and he won, so it still worked out for him and that's what matters. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted October 12, 2019 Author Share Posted October 12, 2019 5 minutes ago, Nazgul said: And that's one of the main reason's why I think I'm done. Don't get me wrong - I like the dynamics of it. But I don't see how I make it far again and I have no interest in playing a game that I can't win. I lost the jury vote from the same people here that I did in BB6, and in part I can't help but feel like it's me in general (partly) that people don't want winning. When you engage yourself as much as I do in these things to have the rug pulled from under your feet not once, not twice, but three times is heartbreaking. It may be just a silly forum game with people I've never met. I play this game relentlessly to win every time and getting denied at the end over and over... it wears on you. Especially when you're told how ****ty you are after the fact. Not a good feeling. honestly, you have nothing to prove. youre a friggin allstar. cant make 3 finals in 5 seasons otherwise. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight_Schrute Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 As much as I agree with @Nazgul's perspective, I don't want @FinneasGage to think I'm speaking out against him or his victory. I think he's a completely competent winner, and I love how active he was this game. The biggest gripe in the past with him was how'd he would disappear for a while, and that wasn't the case this time. He did impact the game and it was fun to follow along for it's duration. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nazgul Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 I feel like a few of my DRs have been skipped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MacReady Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 2 minutes ago, Dwight_Schrute said: Everybody understands that. You're only hating because the late game decision went against you. Not true. Last year was the same thing. Nazgul was not responsible for me going home in BB6, and it was the same. If he had done that to Finn or anyone else I would not have voted for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted October 12, 2019 Author Share Posted October 12, 2019 missions last DR session after death laying it all out On 9/16/2019 at 11:23 PM, mission27 said: Diary Session: Honestly the way this season ended has left a very bad taste in my mouth. I understand playing the game and being indirect, but a couple of players in this game who are vets, who I have known a long time and generally respected, and who I actively tried to work with played extremely dirty. Talking about ET and flux. ET from day 1 was gunning for the MoL for seemingly no reason, back doored me unprovoked. I survived purely using my own skill and won an HoH and put up ET which was completely provoked and had the magnanimity to OK Outpost taking him off the block, in exchange for a non-aggression pact, which he immediately violated. That was pretty bad... he went back on his word... but what he did with the posting of PMs was just dirty. When ET came to us and said he wanted to work with us and wanted our advice on who to nominate, I figured it was a ploy to get info and told TLO as much. TLO isn’t as disciplined with the diplomacy and he said some stuff he shouldn’t. But realistically, I never in my wildest dreams expected ET To publicly post a bunch of PMs. Thats not something thats ever been done in BB and is plain dirty. Flux... I have less proof of what he did but am equally appalled When it was TLO vs jfin I shared some info with flux because I thought he had the right to know jfin did not have his back and genuinely believed TLO would be a much better ally for the pair of us. I prefaced this by asking for his word he would not share any of this information with jfin, because jfin was my friend, I did not want him to get upset the way he does when he doesn’t feel undying loyalty, and it was not my intention to speak ill of him. Flux agreed and then (I suspect) immediately shared those PMs. I suspect this because not 5 minutes after I sent those PMs I got a PM from jfin saying something along the lines of “I hear you’ve been disloyal” and from that point forward he was a lost cause. I suspect this also because flux is basically the only person I have ever said anything negative to about jfin... I was truly neutral in the process... and even in this case, did not really say anything negative... just passed on some information I believed was relevant to our collective decision. Flux admitted to me he told jfin I campaigned against him, but hasn’t admitted everything. Still I strongly suspect. Jfin’s behavior in this game was out of control as usual. I think he likes to play the scorned lover card and act all dramatic. Think he expected me to get down on my knees and beg his forgiveness. I do not think he expected me to react the way I did, but I’m sick of it. Jfin was a good friend of mine. But so was TLO... even more so... everyone knows that, TLO is my friend IRL and strongest ally, and its not unreasonable for me to vote to save TLO over jfin. If I’d been going around talking **** about jfin thats one thing. But I was relatively neutral. He overreacted... he stabbed me in the back very deliberately... and its over between us. Finally Outpost played the JBURGE role in this game. Not as well, tbh. But he clearly has a final 2 with fin or someone. Hes too stubborn to have figured out TLO and I were much better allies before it was too late. Oh well, hes not going to win imo. The others (pickle, untouch, and naz) didn’t really do anything too objectionable in my mind and my hope is one of those 3 wins... although untouch in particular I’d like to see win. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight_Schrute Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 1 minute ago, Adrenaline_Flux said: Funny enough, a huge stickler in my decision is that as much as this was true in the first half of the game, I really felt he faltered in the jury phase where everyone besides ET was basically competing to take him to F2 and he actively pushed away almost everyone. He unnecessarily made it harder for himself to get to the end. Thankfully for him though, he still did and he won, so it still worked out for him and that's what matters. Exactly what I thought. He made moves but they all seemingly made him work harder than he needed to. I put that in my write up. I negged him for it, but it definitely showed his tenacity for his ability to overcome his biggest obstacles which were always himself. I think he got eager with making the moves that he just did what he wanted to every cycle without thinking of the repercussions afterwards lol 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nazgul Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 Just now, Malfatron said: honestly, you have nothing to prove. youre a friggin allstar. cant make 3 finals in 5 seasons otherwise. I'm closest on this site with Dwight and JBurge. I was so critical to both of their wins. You don't know how sucky and embarrassing it is to have three 2nds when they both have wins. It was already a joke. Can't wait for it now. ******* kill me now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nazgul Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 2 minutes ago, Nazgul said: I feel like a few of my DRs have been skipped. I've had at least two skipped that I can see. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted October 12, 2019 Author Share Posted October 12, 2019 1 minute ago, Nazgul said: I've had at least two skipped that I can see. if they are before 9/16 i will circle back otherwise, they are coming 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dwight_Schrute Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 2 minutes ago, Nazgul said: I'm closest on this site with Dwight and JBurge. I was so critical to both of their wins. You don't know how sucky and embarrassing it is to have three 2nds when they both have wins. It was already a joke. Can't wait for it now. ******* kill me now. We give you a hard time, but it's just a joke. JBurge has already called you a better player than me. That snake. I did him dirty in FFBB5 so I can't blame him I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adrenaline_Flux Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 1 minute ago, Dwight_Schrute said: Exactly what I thought. He made moves but they all seemingly made him work harder than he needed to. I put that in my write up. I negged him for it, but it definitely showed his tenacity for his ability to overcome his biggest obstacles which were always himself. I think he got eager with making the moves that he just did what he wanted to every cycle without thinking of the repercussions afterwards lol When put in that way it both 1) illustrates why it was difficult for someone like me who puts an emphasis on good gameplay from a social and strategic perspective to give him a vote and 2) perfectly places a narrative on fin's journey to becoming the winner that makes the win beautiful. Taking on a chunk of the house in the first half of the game, having your two longest tenured friends go ham on you for playing for ratings and being a wildcard, and then putting obstacles in your own way, unable to get away from that wildcardism, only to still prevail and win? It's a beautiful and fun narrative. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted October 12, 2019 Author Share Posted October 12, 2019 Production only posted Nazguls first DR session. lets go back in time to see Nazguls thoughts while many people were still in the game! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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