Ravens place tag on QB Lamar Jackson; Jackson requests trade (Page 52)

[MikeT14]

1 hour ago, Xenos said:

He’s good with legal jargon ie. anything related to the breakdown of a contract for example. But he sucks as a reporter.

Zero disagreement from me. 

[diamondbull424]

3 hours ago, Soko said:

But Ken, there are also tons of legitimately stupid products that never made money, they’re actually the majority…

I never stated this product was bound to make money. It probably will fail, but tons of great ideas have failed and tons of stupid ideas have succeeded.

But the general idea of the product isn’t legitimately terrible. Mobile gym that you can take with you on vacation, when going camping, to the beach, etc?

Thats not a legitimately bad idea considering that Millennials and Zoomers all seem to be very pro health conscious consumers and appreciate the outdoors. The idea of the product is in line with todays burgeoning consumer.

But the marketing of it looks genuinely bad and the idea could use a technological injection to better cater to the intended demographic. Some sort of interactive screen that tracks data and progress is missing.

But overall, this idea has potential, it’s not a stupid idea and the product itself while basic, depending on the price point could make sense.

Pair it with a more interactive and improved model at a higher price point and I could get behind it… with better marketing of its utility, of course. The marketing is terrible, I don’t believe they truly understand their target audience and how to best present the value to them… and that would be why this will probably fail, but not the idea and/or the product itself.

[Soko]

31 minutes ago, diamondbull424 said:

But the general idea of the product isn’t legitimately terrible. Mobile gym that you can take with you on vacation, when going camping, to the beach, etc?

You may have a point 

I remember last summer my friends and I were all at the beach, drinking, fishing, grilling, you know just enjoying the day. Weather was nice, obviously hot, but not too hot with the breeze. But something felt off. No matter what I did, I just couldn’t sit still or get comfortable. I couldn’t have a good time. And that’s when it hit me: why didn’t anyone bring a yoga mat with a couple 2.5lb dumbbells so that we can all get some working sets in?

Hotel gyms? Who needs em! Not me, because I can do a full workout in my hotel room, right there on the floor. Sure I had to pay for an extra bag on my flight that went way over the weight limit - but who could put a price on convenience? And so what if it doesn’t pack a real amount of weight and only carries what’s appropriate for my mom’s  Pilates class? When you bozos are out getting an all inclusive breakfast or using the hotel gym with actual weights and actual equipment, I’ll be getting my sweat on with the Entire Gym. I don’t even need to use the battery on my phone or iPad that I’ve kept charging all night and is at 100% to give me workouts, because I’ve bought the subscription plan for the same exercises on my entire gym. 

Taking the family camping for the week? Well don’t you worry, the Entire Gym has got you covered. Just make some more trunk space and make sure you pack something to charge the Entire Gym’s patent pending iPa- I mean home exercise screen. Whether it be in your already cramped tent or right out there in the great outdoors, there’s never a bad time or place to whip out the proprietary foam mat (it’s not a yoga mat, we swear) and get going on your routine. Can’t get a full workout with only 2.5lb dumbbells? Well you’re in luck, because for a limited time at the low low cost of $499.99 you can purchase the accessory kit (dubbed the Entirer Gym) which DOUBLES, yes I said DOUBLES, the amount of weight you can be lifting with the Entire Gym. That’s 5 whole pounds, meaning less time working out, and more muscle for you to fight off the bear that wants to eat your kids. 

I need this product 

Edited March 24, 2023 by Soko

[MWil23]

6 minutes ago, Soko said:

You may have a point 

I remember last summer my friends and I were all at the beach, drinking, fishing, grilling, you know just enjoying the day. Weather was nice, obviously hot, but not too hot with the breeze. But something felt off. No matter what I did, I just couldn’t sit still or get comfortable. I couldn’t have a good time. And that’s when it hit me: why didn’t anyone bring a yoga mat with a couple 2.5lb dumbbells so that we can all get some working sets in?

LOLOL

This and @Ragnarok’s “I could do it with a briefcase” post wins the thread

[Ray Reed]

😂😂😂

[MWil23]

This thread is just the gift that keeps on giving!

[Ragnarok]

41 minutes ago, Ray Reed said:

😂😂😂

So while their workout luggage is moronic, its not uncommon to reuse legal documents like terms and conditions.  1.  They can't be copywritten. And 2.  There's only so many ways to write boilerplate language.  I do it a lot for contracts.

That said, their inability to use control F is hilarious.

[AFlaccoSeagulls]

1 hour ago, Ray Reed said:

😂😂😂

Lamar is about to call a press conference outside the Four Seasons landscaping company tomorrow at this rate.

Edited March 24, 2023 by AFlaccoSeagulls

[Ray Reed]

1 hour ago, Ragnarok said:

So while their workout luggage is moronic, its not uncommon to reuse legal documents like terms and conditions.  1.  They can't be copywritten. And 2.  There's only so many ways to write boilerplate language.  I do it a lot for contracts.

That said, their inability to use control F is hilarious.

[Xmad]

2 hours ago, Ragnarok said:

So while their workout luggage is moronic, its not uncommon to reuse legal documents like terms and conditions.  1.  They can't be copywritten. And 2.  There's only so many ways to write boilerplate language.  I do it a lot for contracts.

That said, their inability to use control F is hilarious.

In their defense the company existed as of about 47 hours ago.

The entire legal department is just Ken in a dollar tree costume.

1 hour ago, AFlaccoSeagulls said:

Lamar is about to call a press conference outside the Four Seasons landscaping company tomorrow at this rate.

Live on Lamar's youtube channel we present: Lamar signing a 5 year 300,000,000 contracts fully guaranteed.

Warning contract may only be paid out in yen not USD.

[sham63]

18 hours ago, adamq said:

It's not actually an entire gym

But the Pocket Fisherman was neither a pocket nor a fisherman. 😀 I bet it made Ron Popeil a lot of money anyway.

[adamq]

.

Edited March 24, 2023 by adamq

[adamq]

54 minutes ago, sham63 said:

But the Pocket Fisherman was neither a pocket nor a fisherman. 😀 I bet it made Ron Popeil a lot of money anyway.

I actually can't argue with you, at least once a month I buy a &%&#ing Pop It for my 7 year old

[Soko]

4 hours ago, Ragnarok said:

So while their workout luggage is moronic, its not uncommon to reuse legal documents like terms and conditions.  1.  They can't be copywritten. And 2.  There's only so many ways to write boilerplate language.  I do it a lot for contracts.

That said, their inability to use control F is hilarious.

At this rate, Lamar’s fully GTD contract will have the Baltimore Ravens paying Deshaun Watson

[diamondbull424]

5 hours ago, Soko said:

You may have a point 

I remember last summer my friends and I were all at the beach, drinking, fishing, grilling, you know just enjoying the day. Weather was nice, obviously hot, but not too hot with the breeze. But something felt off. No matter what I did, I just couldn’t sit still or get comfortable. I couldn’t have a good time. And that’s when it hit me: why didn’t anyone bring a yoga mat with a couple 2.5lb dumbbells so that we can all get some working sets in?

Something’s not adding up, you were enjoying the day, but also not comfortable? Yet you didn’t think it would be a good idea to whip out your ‘shake weight’ set to warm up your forearms for that party you and your friends would later enjoy? The one where you all sit around in a circle and… well, shake weights.

5 hours ago, Soko said:

Hotel gyms? Who needs em! Not me, because I can do a full workout in my hotel room, right there on the floor. Sure I had to pay for an extra bag on my flight that went way over the weight limit - but who could put a price on convenience? And so what if it doesn’t pack a real amount of weight and only carries what’s appropriate for my mom’s  Pilates class? When you bozos are out getting an all inclusive breakfast or using the hotel gym with actual weights and actual equipment, I’ll be getting my sweat on with the Entire Gym. I don’t even need to use the battery on my phone or iPad that I’ve kept charging all night and is at 100% to give me workouts, because I’ve bought the subscription plan for the same exercises on my entire gym. 

I can’t lie. You’re brave to fly with your Entire Gym. I would think it’d make more sense just to have it for backpacking trips in your car and/or for continental nomads- you know, where presumably one wouldn’t be at the mercy of a weight limit.

However I admire your pioneering spirit and the greater utility this product can bring to your life.

5 hours ago, Soko said:

Taking the family camping for the week? Well don’t you worry, the Entire Gym has got you covered. Just make some more trunk space and make sure you pack something to charge the Entire Gym’s patent pending iPa- I mean home exercise screen. Whether it be in your already cramped tent or right out there in the great outdoors, there’s never a bad time or place to whip out the proprietary foam mat (it’s not a yoga mat, we swear) and get going on your routine. Can’t get a full workout with only 2.5lb dumbbells? Well you’re in luck, because for a limited time at the low low cost of $499.99 you can purchase the accessory kit (dubbed the Entirer Gym) which DOUBLES, yes I said DOUBLES, the amount of weight you can be lifting with the Entire Gym. That’s 5 whole pounds, meaning less time working out, and more muscle for you to fight off the bear that wants to eat your kids. 

Admirable. Even though you’re not really in the target demographic, look at you making this work for you! I figured some in the 44% of adults, 18-49 years old, that have no plans to have kids might have the trunk space and the lifestyle that this might appeal to.

However with an entire family and an overpacked trunk, your dedication to staying in shape and not developing a dad bod is truly commendable.

Heck and I’m sure you didn’t know this because you’re just now upgrading from your thigh cruncher and shake weight, but as opposed to paying to upgrade for the double weight package, you could just use the bar and resistance bands to gain 340 lbs of workout tension for your squats and curls.

5 hours ago, Soko said:

I need this product

Just remember not to throw away your ‘thigh cruncher’ and ‘shake weight’ because the next time you and your best buds get together by the lake on that Goldilocks day- you know where it’s not too hot, but just warm enough- and you all sit in a wide circle around the fire… you want to make sure your thighs and forearms are already warmed up. You wouldn’t want to pull a muscle.

You’re not as young as you used to be before you had kids… and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to miss out on swallowing marshmallows with your best buds.

EDIT: And considering the climate, let me be clear, I don’t judge you for any of such activities as above, what’s normal for you is normal… live in your truth coach.

Well… except for the stuff with the cows and your shake weight, that’s not normal. 

 

Edited March 25, 2023 by diamondbull424