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What Are You Thinking About v.CC


pwny

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12 hours ago, domepatrol91 said:

Since everyone is getting all feely and talking about life and goals I’ll take advantage of the mood.

 

So telling my SIL she can’t move in with us is easier than kicking her out later, right? Were very conflicfed cause she’s in a bad spot (again) and doesn’t really have a place to live. 

Problem is, she consistently gets herself in these bad spots and does little to get herself out of them or improve her life. She’s terribly depressed and doesn’t want to put the work in to get better. She just jumps from house to house living with whoever will take her until they’ve had enough and kick her out. It usually ruins the relationship with whoever it was

She’s easy to get along with most of the time but has bipolar swings every so often, she’s not taking care of her mental health at all. She’s mooched off people her whole life and at 24 years old has paid rent for a total of 4 months

 I’m all but certain her moving in would just be another cycle where she quits paying shortly after moving in and basically forces us to kick her out.

Someone tell me I’m right please lol if I’m wrong just lie to me

.I’m looking at all of our families relationship long term, having to kick her out would do some serious damage to the family and I don’t want to have to do that 

Is there a way that you can offer help without having her move in? Volunteer to review her resume or applications to any school she wants, offer to pay for a few sessions of therapy if she's willing to take it and her mental health seriously, etc?

If it were me, I wouldn't let her move in. Worse case scenario, that gives her tenant's rights, so you aren't just kicking your sister in law out, you're evicting her. I also wouldn't co-sign on a lease or any loans. Maybe sit down with your wife's parents and figure out a way to present a united front to address it?

12 hours ago, domepatrol91 said:

.I’m looking at all of our families relationship long term, having to kick her out would do some serious damage to the family and I don’t want to have to do that 

This part is tricky. I'd write down or at least plan out how you want to phrase things in advance, especially if you have a sit down with the parents to discuss a plan since there is probably some underlying guilt on their end about how things went so wrong for their kid.

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14 hours ago, domepatrol91 said:

Since everyone is getting all feely and talking about life and goals I’ll take advantage of the mood.

 

So telling my SIL she can’t move in with us is easier than kicking her out later, right? Were very conflicfed cause she’s in a bad spot (again) and doesn’t really have a place to live. 

........

 

I won’t tell you what you should do, but if it were me, there’s no way in hell I’m enabling that mess.

Honesty, and perhaps some tough love, may be the best option.  Tell he no and tell her why.  

10 hours ago, Heimdallr said:

This. Unless you make it very clear that she has to get a job, start seeing a therapist, and have a predetermined timeline on when she needs to have her own place.

You can help her, but only if she starts helping herself.

If you are inclined to do it, this is the only way imo. I’d probably add to this that she’d had responsibilities around the house too. My buddy did this exact thing with his BIL and dude would just chill around the house all day eating all my buddy’s food and drinking his beer until he had a come to Jesus moment with him and gave him a weekly to do list. He figured if some grown man was living rent free in his home, then my buddy shouldn’t be washing dishes, mowing the lawn, shoveling snow, etc.  If someone is living with you they need to be contributing, both with chores as well as financially. 

Of course if you do this, you have to be ready to boot her to the curb if she doesn’t hold up her end of the deal.

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Are there any chemists around or a homework help thread? I have a partition coefficient problem that's got me scratching my head. Usually the prof puts up solutions, but the test is tomorrow and I'm not trying to wait on that.

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4 minutes ago, ramssuperbowl99 said:

Post it.

A single extraction with 100 mL of CHCl3 extracts or removes 88.5% of the weak acid, HA, from 50 mL of aqueous solution. What is the partition coefficient, K, for HA at a pH = 3.00? The Ka for HA is 3.5 x 10-5.

A single extraction with 100 mL of CHCl3 extracts or removes 88.5% of the weak acid, HA, from 50 mL of aqueous solution. What is the Distribution coefficient, D, for HA at a pH = 3.00? The Ka for HA is 3.5 x 10-5.

 

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