What are you thinking about?

[Jeezla]

The Flex Paste guy knows how to make a commercial.

[ET80]

51 minutes ago, Outpost31 said:

I thought my ego was bad.

It's not ego if it's true.

[PARROTHEAD]

So my woman, her sisters and my daughters all have gone for a girls trip hiking and visiting vineyards/wineries through the mountain region for a few days. Son is visiting his mom.

Several days. All to myself. So looked forward to it. The peace, the relaxation. Get some things done around the property.

Its been 9 hours, already done all I wanted to get done somehow.  And now Im about to die of boredom and loneliness. I cant take it. Worst feeling in the world. By this time tomorrow Ill be talking to a Titlist, that I dubbed Titlist. He cant even swim, so thats off the menu. Dont know what Im going to do.

[Forge]

2 hours ago, ET80 said:

I'm sure you're familiar with this image. Michael Jordan over Craig Ehlo, game winner against the Cavs. One of the most iconic images in sports history.

Little known fact about this moment - Jordan isn't pumping his fist because he won. Jordan won many times in his life, big moments too. No, Jordan is pumping his fist after burying the Cavs because it was in this moment... He realized he had The GIFT. All that he surveyed on a basketball court was his, he could alter time, space and reality into whatever he chose. 

This takes us... into my journey into the kitchen. It was the tail end of 2020, we had all been cooped in for the year and we all needed to pick up something to occupy us. I ventured into cooking, and it was an entertaining distraction. I had an air fryer, an Instant Pot, a Cast Iron skillet, a Traeger grill - good tools for their specific lot in life, but nothing that could create magic. I did some great things early on -  North Carolina pork chops, Chinese beef spare ribs, Italian style sausage and peppers, Dr Pepper soaked baby back ribs - you knew there was something special here, much like Jordan.

So, we're closing in on Christmas dinner. For Thanksgiving, I volunteered to make a turkey - I had made a turkey before, but never on my own. I made it myself and it was a resounding success; I then took the leftover turkey, shredded it with some bacon, made my own cream sauce and boom, we had turkey carbonara - absolutely amazing. In my journey, Thanksgiving was the equivalent of Jordan dropping 63 vs the Celtics. Incredible effort... but just an introduction.

So, after Thanksgiving, it's decreed that I'm doing EVERYTHING for Christmas dinner - main course, sides, dessert. Wife wants to help, but after she butchered the Thanksgiving ham (who the HELL uses a dutch oven on a ham!?) I simply opened a bottle of wine and told her to watch the kids and dogs - too much was on the line. In my journey, this is sending Dennis Rodman to party with Carmen Electra. (I think that's how it happened with Jordan).

Menu was created ahead of time by me - I was going to leave it all on the floor that day:

- A Standing Rib roast/Prime Rib (six ribs) with au jus and horseradish. (I also made a Argentinian chimichuri sauce if anyone wasn't a fan of au jus and horseradish)

- Traditional yorkshire pudding made from rib roast fat drippings

- Spiral Ham (in a proper baking pan, in another oven at my mom's place).

- Mushroom Rissoto

- Cucumber Salad (I'll concede that my wife made this - it's her speciality, she knows what she's doing).

- Spicy glazed carrots

- Cheesy broiled asparagus

- Dessert was a "sweet nacho bar" with crushed waffle cones, warm caramel, melted chocolate, vanilla/chocolate/mint chocolate chip ice cream. (Full disclosure, this brilliant idea is courtesy of @SwAg).

I had planned about two weeks in advance - I started dry aging the rib roast a week before go time, I glazed and wrapped the ham, cut all veggies on Christmas Eve while watching A Christmas Story - everything was ready.

Day of is a blur, but my wife came through in the clutch, much like Rodman - she bought me a legitimate carving knife, one of those with a rounded end. I was now ready. I worked multiple stations, checking on everything all at once while rotating everything for maximum preparation. Only thing I remember was the 6th alarm going off - that was the moment I had to run out of my house down to my mom's house (she lives in the same neighborhood as I do) to get the ham out of the oven. I sprinted to her house, took the ham out, glazed it with a spicy honey base and tented it. My sister said she could have done that for me, but... Well, I could see her using a dutch oven to make it, so I couldn't delegate this effort. She could bring the ham when they were ready to come over, that works.

When the roast was done, I took out my new carver; One single slice to remove the ribs... and the aroma? The juice? I started to fist pump like Jordan. In that moment, I realized I had... The GIFT.

Dinner was phenomenal that day, my mom was legitimately speechless (might have to do with the wine, but I don't know) on how I managed to create from start to finish. My sister said it was the best prime rib she's ever had, she forced herself to have one with the au jus/horseradish and another one with the chimichuri because she simply wanted to experience both. My wife was excited that she was no longer on the hook to screw up another ham. I simply shrugged my shoulders...

So, to field your inquiry - no, I don't make food. I make art.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because I have... The GIFT.

This is great. Kudos to you 

[Forge]

10 hours ago, D82 said:

You don't? 

I make cereal. Bake some chicken. I can use a foreman grill like nobody's business. I own.... Herbs, I guess

[seminoles1]

Shocked that Chadwick Boseman didn't win Best Actor. Even the Academy is shocked. They legit rearranged the awards so Best Actor was presented last, presumably to give Boseman an amazing sendoff and end the night so there wasn't that awful emotional rollercoaster like when Ledger won in the middle of the ceremony.

Welp...Anthony Hopkins won.

[PARROTHEAD]

Day 2 of being alone. Star Wars vs. Parrothead Edition

Still losing my mind. How do single people do it? I figured it out. And Ive been checking out Star Wars. My cheery is popped. And last night I made it through one. Rogue One I believe was the title. Then went through Solo without much issue.

Today. It took hours of stopping and going. But I made it through The Force Awakens. The very movie I only made it through 15 mins of before declaring the worst hunk of garbage ever filmed. But in fighting through. I discovered 2 things. 1.) I love all these ships. Have a Capts license, love anything mobile, Cars, boats, planes, horses doesnt matter... and 2.) I do like tiny boobs as much as big boobs. Dont care about middle sized ones. Too abundant I guess. A's or D's now for me. So I like this girl in this movie. Shes so over the top plain that it makes her special in the same way the Mona Lisa or Whistlers Mother pulls it off as paintings.

Now into The Last Jedi I go.

 

[Shockwave]

@PARROTHEAD listen with your limited freedom. Watch as many violent movies as you can. All the flicks you couldn't watch when your family is present.  Get it all out of your system. Trust me from a man with a 23 year old and a 20 year old living at home... cherish your time alone..

[K9]

9 hours ago, PARROTHEAD said:

Day 2 of being alone. Star Wars vs. Parrothead Edition

Still losing my mind. How do single people do it? I figured it out. And Ive been checking out Star Wars. My cheery is popped. And last night I made it through one. Rogue One I believe was the title. Then went through Solo without much issue.

 

 

How do people with families do it!? I can't imagine coming back after to work to talk to more people, deal with feeding them and any quarrels. I'm not against kids or SO's. I just like going to work, conversing with others and then having the rest of my evening/ night = free time. I watch what I want, eat what I want and have the time to myself. 

If you're used to having the fam around, get it - but enjoy it for what it is now. Watch what you want, eat what you want and enjoy your own company .... it's pretty friggin awesome   

[PARROTHEAD]

7 hours ago, K9 said:

How do people with families do it!? I can't imagine coming back after to work to talk to more people, deal with feeding them and any quarrels. I'm not against kids or SO's. I just like going to work, conversing with others and then having the rest of my evening/ night = free time. I watch what I want, eat what I want and have the time to myself. 

If you're used to having the fam around, get it - but enjoy it for what it is now. Watch what you want, eat what you want and enjoy your own company .... it's pretty friggin awesome   

Find a local meals on wheels and work that for a day. Youll be married and have her knocked up in a week thinking bout your own mortality. Without whats around me and stuck pondering thoughts like that. I couldnt last. These elderly with no one and nothing in their lives as such is heartbreaking to me.

Some do enjoy the free life. I get it. Its your thing. But I forward think on it. Being surrounded by kids and grandkids in those years. Is the only thing Ill ever ask for out of life. I did my duty to all the generations before me and pushed our line forward. And be surrounded by nothing but love when it all comes to an end makes it all worth it in itself.

[ET80]

1 hour ago, PARROTHEAD said:

Find a local meals on wheels and work that for a day. Youll be married and have her knocked up in a week thinking bout your own mortality. Without whats around me and stuck pondering thoughts like that. I couldnt last. These elderly with no one and nothing in their lives as such is heartbreaking to me.

Some do enjoy the free life. I get it. Its your thing. But I forward think on it. Being surrounded by kids and grandkids in those years. Is the only thing Ill ever ask for out of life. I did my duty to all the generations before me and pushed our line forward. And be surrounded by nothing but love when it all comes to an end makes it all worth it in itself.

I never thought we'd agree on anything... but here we are, agreeing on something.

[ramssuperbowl99]

20 hours ago, Shockwave said:

@PARROTHEAD listen with your limited freedom. Watch as many violent movies as you can. All the flicks you couldn't watch when your family is present.  Get it all out of your system. Trust me from a man with a 23 year old and a 20 year old living at home... cherish your time alone..

And for the love of god pee with the door open and leave the toilet seat up.

[ET80]

21 hours ago, Shockwave said:

@PARROTHEAD listen with your limited freedom. Watch as many violent movies as you can. All the flicks you couldn't watch when your family is present.  Get it all out of your system. Trust me from a man with a 23 year old and a 20 year old living at home... cherish your time alone..

All of the John Wick movies. Forward, backwards, forwards while watching backwards. 

That's a starting point.

[PARROTHEAD]

23 hours ago, Shockwave said:

@PARROTHEAD listen with your limited freedom. Watch as many violent movies as you can. All the flicks you couldn't watch when your family is present.  Get it all out of your system. Trust me from a man with a 23 year old and a 20 year old living at home... cherish your time alone..

I havent watched a total of 20 movies this entire century. That includes this Star Wars bundle Im working through and all 4 or 5 Sharknados. lol

But stay tuned. Finishing up dinner and Rise of Skywalker for my complete viewing experience review.

[PARROTHEAD]

Before I get rolling. I was hoping to see this puppy in the series. Spotted it in Rogue 1. Next trilogy. Boom. Heres your star. Falcon had this entire trilogy. Let her take a break.