Weightlifting & Fitness - Everything old is new again!

[ramssuperbowl99]

3 minutes ago, MWil23 said:

All good points for sure. I immediately went into "coach/dad" mode, and so emasculating a gym bro like that is something that I used to do to players who would make fun of some of their weaker teammates. It's that old alpha "I'm stronger and more athletic than you, how would you feel by me adding 2 anchor chains and cranking out 50 push ups as I'm making excessive angry eye contact with you as you struggle" mindset. Then you stand up for that "weaker" kid and explain to the guys how strength/gains work and what being a good teammate looks like.

Yeah, in hindsight my motives weren't always there 100%, but I'd like to think that the message rang true and I really won over some of those kids I stuck up for...while teaching young men some valuable leadership lessons about sticking up for those weaker than ourselves, in whatever capacity that may be.

In this case, I suppose you run out some tool bag, which isn't all bad either. Hopefully he learns and evolves from it.

There's no perfect answer.

The only way to show the other guy that he was being a jerk was to demonstrate, and that involves you publicly being a jerk to him. But it stops the BS stone dead, so if you can get away with it, you can be done with the whole situation same day.

Otherwise, you have to find door number 3. Personally, I think the best weapon is laughter, so more and more I try to stay detached in those moments so it comes off like I'm laughing at the person/situation instead of taking it seriously. Like in this case with the benefit of hindsight, I'd be trying to lean the other way and embarrass the hell out of the guy.

"Oh yeah, let me rack that for you. Oh no, I insist. And wow look at that perfect form. See Teddy, this is what I was telling you about. Could you let us know what you're doing for supplements/rest? And, I gotta ask, are you natural? I mean, don't take this the wrong way, you don't look it. Haven't seen someone make 135 on the bench look that easy since middle school. Are you a trainer here? Oh man, I think they're hiring. Here let me get you an application."

[Sugashane]

1 hour ago, ramssuperbowl99 said:

If you're looking for someone to tell you that you kinda ****ed up, I'll say yes, technically, but at a 1.5/10 or 2/10 at most. It's the classic parenting conundrum where you're stuck between not giving the bully the reward of attention, or kicking the **** out of him one time to send a message. Tough line to ride.

1.5-2 is better than I'd have given myself probably so I'll take it. Lol

To be fair I never did have even the slightest inclination for physical harm, just figured he deserved some of his own medicine. 

1 hour ago, ramssuperbowl99 said:

Your posts' justification was like 10% "my nephew was pissed" and 90% "separate to the specific incident, this is something that bothered me for a while because of my self-image/gym intimidation issues which we all have". Could be how you wrote the story and not what it was, but that'd be the kind of thing where I'd feel prone to going over the top or not letting it go quickly enough compared to something where I don't have any previous investment. So if you want to beat yourself up for any of it, that's probably the angle.

Completely fair points. 

A lot of it is me, a lot of it is that when I was personal training I worked with a lot of people who were really insecure because of their situation. 300lb women or 350lb+ guys who knew they were getting mocked by people. Now I'm far from the "you're beautiful at any size camp," vehemently the opposite actually. But hearing how they felt like they had to choose between basically an early death or public shaming really pisses me off, yes 99% of the time they put themselves in that physical condition but at least they're trying to dig themselves out of that hole. 

1 hour ago, ramssuperbowl99 said:

Putting myself in the situation, I think the best thing you could do would be to make fun of the guy if he does it again or laugh at him. That way, some onlooker/staff member isn't seeing him running away from you machine to machine as you one up him.

Definitely would have been the more mature thing to do, no argument here at all. I'll probably talk to him if I see him again and let him know I was an *** but why I was too. 

[ramssuperbowl99]

24 minutes ago, Sugashane said:

1.5-2 is better than I'd have given myself probably so I'll take it. Lol

To be fair I never did have even the slightest inclination for physical harm, just figured he deserved some of his own medicine. 

Completely fair points. 

A lot of it is me, a lot of it is that when I was personal training I worked with a lot of people who were really insecure because of their situation. 300lb women or 350lb+ guys who knew they were getting mocked by people. Now I'm far from the "you're beautiful at any size camp," vehemently the opposite actually. But hearing how they felt like they had to choose between basically an early death or public shaming really pisses me off, yes 99% of the time they put themselves in that physical condition but at least they're trying to dig themselves out of that hole. 

Definitely would have been the more mature thing to do, no argument here at all. I'll probably talk to him if I see him again and let him know I was an *** but why I was too. 

100%. I was on the fence about writing anything except "great job", because there was no way to give that without undercutting exactly how big a doucebag this guy was.

I probably wouldn't talk to him, for exactly why you said. He knew what he was doing, he knew the effect that it would have, and he did it repeatedly anyway. It's not just an actual adult deliberately making fun of your nephew, it's that he picked something that your nephew was trying to 'fix' about himself, and something that people take very seriously. That's how eating disorders and steroid abuse start. **** him.

I'd talk to the staff though. Especially since you know if he pulls that stunt again, he'll do it while you aren't around.

[MWil23]

57 minutes ago, ramssuperbowl99 said:

Otherwise, you have to find door number 3. Personally, I think the best weapon is laughter, so more and more I try to stay detached in those moments so it comes off like I'm laughing at the person/situation instead of taking it seriously. Like in this case with the benefit of hindsight, I'd be trying to lean the other way and embarrass the hell out of the guy.

"Oh yeah, let me rack that for you. Oh no, I insist. And wow look at that perfect form. See Teddy, this is what I was telling you about. Could you let us know what you're doing for supplements/rest? And, I gotta ask, are you natural? I mean, don't take this the wrong way, you don't look it. Haven't seen someone make 135 on the bench look that easy since middle school. Are you a trainer here? Oh man, I think they're hiring. Here let me get you an application."

Probably the way I'd handle it/would have handled it if it was with someone other than "a kid", no doubt. Sometimes that "protector" gene just kicks in, then you figure out like 30 minutes later...:

...but I also think it's the duty of all of us to put clowns in their place who are adults and should generally know better. I kind of have an "act like a clown, get treated like one" montra when it comes to those college age or older, and I'm not generally a very confrontational person in public. 

Either way, I think we're on the same page here that these are not people who can be "reasoned" with in terms of having a conversation like "Hey man, he's a new lifter. You should be applauding him for being here. He's making significant improvements and gains. If you want to rep in, so be it, but there's no call for that or you and I can work something else out man to man."

[naptownskinsfan]

Finished my second half-marathon on Sunday.  Ran at an 8:01/mile pace according to my watch, but the race gun had me at 7:53/mile.  I guess the slow corral affected that time, as well as the course falling a little bit short.  But either way, it was a huge improvement over my 8:43/mile pace from the Baltimore Half from October, with nearly 400 feet more elevation and I champed all of the hills.  My girlfriend and my best friend and his newborn were there to cheer me on near the end of the course and also saw two other friends of mine who were in the race.  

Overall, I finished 57 out of 373, and 22 out of 53 for men 30-39.  I already have some more races in the books including half marathons in Vegas (Feb), DC (March), Wilmington DE (April), Frederick MD (May) and a 10 miler in Baltimore (June.). I’m also going to do a full marathon this year in Baltimore in October, and I’ll be doing some Spartan and Savage races this year as well.  I’m also doing the Cooper River Bridge Run in Charleston SC in April, similar to the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Run I did here in November.  

[naptownskinsfan]

On 12/1/2022 at 11:26 AM, minutemancl said:

I think I said this before in here, but man, sympathy weight is very, very real.

I got my first body scan in a year last week, and I'm up 10 pounds total while also losing about a pound of muscle, so definitely not great. But that's what happens when you have a kid I guess, even when you are just the dad. Starting a new job doesn't help either. I was super inconsistent in the gym for a while and it caught up to me.

Good news is my coaches, and I, think I should bounce back quickly, and early returns are already promising. I think I'm already down 2.5-3 pounds in 1.5 weeks thanks to going back consistently to the gym. Eating habits have remained exactly the same, but I'm not drinking during the week anymore (Monday-Thursday). Just cutting out those few beers (I'd only drink like 1, max 2, on any given weeknight) has helped a lot as well. The cycle we are working on now involves lots of ski erg, gymnastics movements under fatigue (so cardio kind of superset with handstand pushups, pull ups, etc), and tempo front squats.

Short term goal is to lose 5 pounds, longer term goal is to get back to my weight from a year ago, and long term goal is to get probably around 5 pounds even less than that and get my consistent muscle ups back.

What really helps is that my wife and I go to the same gym, and we bring the kid when we go and work out together. He's such a good kid and loves watching us work out and is honestly more comfortable around loud music than when it is quiet. He passes out regularly at the gym. If I were to not see them from the time I leave for work until the time I get back from the gym, I'd hardly ever get to spend time with them, especially the kid, so this works out great.

When I had a breakup over the beginning of the summer, I shedded weight, nearly 20 pounds.  It was crazy.  I had done something similar before when I went on vacation and came back and got into my routine.  You should breeze past those goals in short order.  

Also, I’m really interested to hear about the body scan.  I’ve mentioned in a couple places here that I’ve lost 200 pounds, and if that can also determine how much excess skin I am carrying that would be great.  I’m not sure how much more weight I have to lose to be honest.  

[naptownskinsfan]

On 12/11/2022 at 12:07 PM, Sugashane said:

So am I may be an ***hole here too, or maybe it seem justified. You can tell me. Rant incoming. 

My nephew is 20 and is tall and skinny, 6'0", and was 154 but he started out around 141 earlier this year and was skinny-fat. He now has abs outlined and has put on 13 pounds, so maybe 15-17 pounds of muscle added. Been awesome. So I let him know when I will be lifting and he shows up when he can, and does the workout I gave him when I'm not. 

Today we are lifting (he is doing WS4SB) and I'm doing DC, so completely different workouts and weights. I'v been lifting consistently since high school outside of COVID, BMT, and injury breaks, maybe 3 years off in the last 20. I was 313 in Jan (got fat for my lifting leverages) and I'm slowly working it down to try and keep my weights up, and am 273. Nowhere near the biggest or strongest at my gym, but I can wear whatever baggy crap I want and people know immediately I lift and am not JUST fat. lol

So nephew gets done with his first set of bench and this older guy jumps in and does it 10-15 times then goes back to his exercise. No issue, dude was just working in I thought and was kinda a jerk by not saying anything. But the guy does his set and then goes to other lifts. My nephew goes to do incline DB press, he gets up to the working weight and the guy does it AGAIN but curls his weights. Call my nephew over and he is pissed because he says the guy mentioned something about "warming up" or "light weight" or some crap. 

So I am pissed because he was mocking the kid, who literally started benching at 85 pounds for 8 reps, (and they were really garbage too  lol). Now he is doing 145 for his sets of 5, and this prick is mocking him. So I told him to just shut up and do his workout and I start following this guy and doing the same to him. I follow him on the deadlift platform machine and do his weight for 20, and thank him for letting me warm up. Then add a plate to each side after his next set. He leaves and goes to lat pulldowns, so I put up my weights and follow. He does 12 reps, I add weight and do 20. He goes to do preacher curls with 85lbs (bar included), I do hammer curls next to him with 75s. He is pissed and leaves after the first set knowing I'm going to keep following him. I cut off my workout there since I know ego lifting is stupid and today was a wasted workout. I just watched and coached up my nephew for his last two exercises. 

I don't care if that makes me an ***hole too. I'm usually a teddy bear in the gym between sets, I'll answer questions all day and spot anyone, but I remember feeling super inadequate around these guys throwing up 3 and 4 plates on their lifts while I was starting, I've literally more than doubled my bodyweight from when I started (clearly not all lean, still have 30-40 lbs to lose but I've added a HELL of a lot of beef to my frame) and I struggled like hell the first 4-5 years. To get bigger/stronger I lived on bodybuilding/powerlifting forums, bought books like Arnold's Encyclopedia to Bodybuilding, Starting Strength, all the used Powerlifting USA mags I could get my hands on from eBay, the bodybuilding mags that ended up being a total waste, etc. Eventually I hired Ken "Skip" Hill to help me learn about nutrition and training, I worked with two guys online that became real-life friends who went by Guardian on another board and then paid to have online consulting Iron Addict on another board (RIP to both of them, fantastic guys I miss talking to). So I felt like my nephew was being degraded I took it way more personally than he did. So I have invested thousands of dollars and hours to learn and train even ignoring how much food I've had to slam down that I absolutely did not want to eat. And I'll be the first to say I'm far from a guru but clearly I learned at least something from these guys that are way more advanced than I ever will be. Through all that I STILL think about how pathetic I felt.

Now I'm 35 and just trying to maintain what I made and slowly work the fat off to maintain at a damn solid 225-245 for the next 20-30 years (IDK what I'll get down too, been a long time since I've been under 270 so I'm going by what I hope will make me happy in the mirror and with my bloodwork to be great) and longevity is becoming my main focus, because there's no way I could maintain 300+ for another 4-5 more years due to the sleep apnea being at that weight caused. Its been miserable for me for the last 4 years so I said this year I was ready to lean out. I want to live to see my grandkids and be George DeFranco when I'm 70. 

Long story short, don't be a **** in the gym. People are trying to better themselves, some may struggle with even showing up to a gym because they feel judged or that they are being mocked - regardless if real or imagined - and most people starting are feeling COMPLETELY vulnerable. People are lost, some get news that they've earned themselves medical issues so there is an urgency added to their stress.  Its human nature to compare yourself to others and when you see advanced guys/girls it can make you feel like crap even if they are nice as most are or can be, so crapping on a person who is trying to better themselves and their health makes you some of the lowest piles of scum in society before illegal activities come into play.

End of rant. 

You did nothing wrong.  Act like an idiot, win stupid prizes.  This is why I don’t go to the gym, it was tough going as a bigger dude.  I lost all of my weight walking and then running, so when I wanted to put on some muscle mass, I started kickboxing.  It’s a really small gym but a great community of members.  

But people often forget that when it comes to fitness, we all start at zero.  Hell, I got a good running base down by last September and Covid set me back but I regained it.  This dude could tear a rotator cuff tomorrow and be back to square one and getting those funny looks a year from now.  He needed to get humbled, and I think you did it.  

Also, you talk about being a friendly, outgoing and helpful guy at the gym, so hopefully the regulars there know you and your nephew, and know you weren’t being a dictator and will keep an close eye on your nephew if the guy didn’t learn his lesson.  

[minutemancl]

On 12/13/2022 at 11:36 AM, naptownskinsfan said:

When I had a breakup over the beginning of the summer, I shedded weight, nearly 20 pounds.  It was crazy.  I had done something similar before when I went on vacation and came back and got into my routine.  You should breeze past those goals in short order.  

Also, I’m really interested to hear about the body scan.  I’ve mentioned in a couple places here that I’ve lost 200 pounds, and if that can also determine how much excess skin I am carrying that would be great.  I’m not sure how much more weight I have to lose to be honest.  

The body scans I've had done were conducted with an InBody 570 machine. It tells you body fat percentage, muscle weight, hydration, and where the fat/muscle is located. It's pretty sweet. Not sure it could tell you much weight is extra skin. It is good for telling you how much weight you have left to lose though. It tells you you have X amount of weight in 100% necessary components (skeletal), Y amount of weight in muscle, and Z amount of weight in fat. Normally, you want to lose only from that Z number, so that would be it. And you need to keep some level of fat, so it is a percentage of that Z value. 

Problem with losing fat is that it often comes along with losing muscle. It's hard to just lose the one. The reason I'm weighing the most right now is last year I bulked up really well and gained a few pounds of solid muscle while losing a few pounds of fat, which is great. In gaining weight recently, I lost just 1 pound of that muscle while gaining several in fat. 

[Sugashane]

On 12/14/2022 at 1:02 PM, minutemancl said:

Problem with losing fat is that it often comes along with losing muscle. It's hard to just lose the one. The reason I'm weighing the most right now is last year I bulked up really well and gained a few pounds of solid muscle while losing a few pounds of fat, which is great. In gaining weight recently, I lost just 1 pound of that muscle while gaining several in fat. 

Man this is a complete psychological battle too. When you spend years trying to get bigger and stronger and then are trying to lean out without losing much muscle... ugh. It is a mind**** to see the weights you're lifting slowly dropping. I'm on a 2ish year plan and hoping this helps preserve what I can.

Kinda cool to see my jaw sharpen up some though. Don't need to have the beard lined up as much   lol

[MWil23]

6 hours ago, Sugashane said:

Man this is a complete psychological battle too. When you spend years trying to get bigger and stronger and then are trying to lean out without losing much muscle... ugh. It is a mind**** to see the weights you're lifting slowly dropping. I'm on a 2ish year plan and hoping this helps preserve what I can.

Kinda cool to see my jaw sharpen up some though. Don't need to have the beard lined up as much   lol

No question. I’m down 15 pounds but my 5x5 sets are down 10-20 pounds on the Olympic lifts. My auxiliary has at least stayed the same. My wife likes the muscle tone though and square jawline. 

[kingseanjohn]

I want to start by saying that I encourage everyone to go to the gym and make positive lifestyle choices. But holy crap, do I hate this time of year at the gym. I had an experience earlier today where I walked up to an empty station, took one step to the side to put my water bottle on a ledge (literally less than 3 feet away), and turned back around to see someone jumped into the station I was at. I hate new years.

I also saw a guy who walked over to try and pick up a 50lb barbell from the rack, couldn't, and then just gave up and walked away instead of grabbing a lighter one. He spent the next 30+min in the gym just slowly walking around staring at equipment and watching people. I kind of wanted to see if he needed help or had questions but I also didn't want him to be self conscious thinking people were watching him.

[jetsfan4life51]

I’m buying a Rogue rack, barbell, a few bumper plates and a few tiny things from a friend. Probably 1.5-2 years old and barely used. I asked her what she wanted for it she told me she doesn’t remember what she paid and wants me to send an offer. 
 

What do you guys think is fair…look up the current prices and go ~80%? Not trying to rip off my friend but not paying full price. 

[Sugashane]

1 hour ago, jetsfan4life51 said:

I’m buying a Rogue rack, barbell, a few bumper plates and a few tiny things from a friend. Probably 1.5-2 years old and barely used. I asked her what she wanted for it she told me she doesn’t remember what she paid and wants me to send an offer. 
 

What do you guys think is fair…look up the current prices and go ~80%? Not trying to rip off my friend but not paying full price. 

80% is more than fair IMO. If you're the one who has to take it down and then reassemble everything I would probably go lower, maybe 60% even.

 

But I'm a cheap sum*****. 😁

 

Honestly though, she should be happy to get rid of something that is just taking up space and getting 50% back on a "bad" (strictly due to lack of use) investment is a pretty good gig. At 80% or so you have not even come close to ripping her off.

[kingseanjohn]

Day two of hell week:

There's a guy doing bench on one of four smith machines. He does a set of 5-8 then goes to a treadmill for 3-5min and then does another set. I've seen at least 4 times back and forth. Plus dumbbells at the smith machine for some unknown reason. 

[naptownskinsfan]

On 12/27/2022 at 2:49 PM, kingseanjohn said:

Day two of hell week:

There's a guy doing bench on one of four smith machines. He does a set of 5-8 then goes to a treadmill for 3-5min and then does another set. I've seen at least 4 times back and forth. Plus dumbbells at the smith machine for some unknown reason. 

Is he trying to do some sort of burst interval cardio? I forget the technical name of it.