cddolphin Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 (edited) 1 hour ago, gopherwrestler said: There’s a difference between hooking up with an 18 year old and never talking to them again, then trying to date them. I would say that trying to date her would be better for her long-term emotional and psychological well-being & growth than putting her on the carosel of hook-up culture. Edited February 26, 2018 by cddolphin 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chiefer Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 (edited) Well she's 19 and I'm 26. But she doesnt drink or smoke, and is going to school. If anything she's a positive influence on me since I want to slow down on both things, and go back to college. I mean yeah I can't take her to the bar, but whatever you only ever find trouble there anyways. We can still go get food, go hiking, etc. There's always work we can talk about. Im not to worried about that. Edited February 26, 2018 by Chiefer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dashing202 Posted March 3, 2018 Share Posted March 3, 2018 On 2/26/2018 at 4:37 PM, Chiefer said: Well she's 19 and I'm 26. But she doesnt drink or smoke, and is going to school. If anything she's a positive influence on me since I want to slow down on both things, and go back to college. I mean yeah I can't take her to the bar, but whatever you only ever find trouble there anyways. We can still go get food, go hiking, etc. There's always work we can talk about. Im not to worried about that. Do you want one honest two cent ? It's gonna be a sucky truth but I don't wanna see you get hurt bro. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
49ersfan Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 (edited) So there's this woman i've known for a couple of years, we're not super close but part of the same social circle and see each other every now and then. I've always thought she was hot but in the beginning i didn't get that vibe from her so we've just been friendly, and i've dated other girls. I even went out with one of her friends (only for a single date) which i think she knew about but other than that i never discussed dating life with her. In the last couple of months when our circle meet for dinner/house parties etc, on and off she will be flirting with me. Like one time will be friendly/polite, next time she'll be flirty, next time she'll just be friendly, etc. Last time started friendly but i offhandedly made a comment about my ex (i just broke up with her a few weeks ago). Nothing bad or anything, just a small thing and then back to our conversation. After that she went really flirty, talking about how she knows i like her. When i was leaving she asked me if i was coming back, so i asked her if she will miss me to which she says yep. And when i left she said i was the best. I didn't feel comfortable making a move cuz i low-key have anxiety and i like to be as sure as possible before making a move. Anyways i texted her yesterday and the vibe i was getting was "polite" again, not flirty. Basically i'm not sure if this woman just has this on/off personality, or if there's actual interest there? I am single and not talking to anyone else so i wonder if i should just rip the bandaid off and give it a shot, and if i should wait for our next meeting or just do it via text. Or should i just move on. Edited March 30, 2018 by 49ersfan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LETSGOBROWNIES Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 Is she drunk/tipsy/been drinking when she’s flirty? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vike daddy Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 41 minutes ago, 49ersfan said: Basically i'm not sure if this woman just has this on/off personality, or if there's actual interest there? I am single and not talking to anyone else so i wonder if i should just rip the bandaid off and give it a shot, and if i should wait for our next meeting or just do it via text. Or should i just move on. why not ask her directly, what's wrong with that? something like... "hey, i sort of get mixed signals from you, and i don't know if you'd like to get closer or just stay friends. what do you think?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cddolphin Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 1 minute ago, vike daddy said: why not ask her directly, what's wrong with that? something like... "hey, i sort of get mixed signals from you, and i don't know if you'd like to get closer or just stay friends. what do you think?" Some women don't want to have to lay it all out from the get-go. She sounds a bit unsure herself. I like the content of the question, but turn it into more of a statement maybe. "We've been hanging out more and I've been enjoying that time, I'd like to get to know you better. Care to blah blah blah later this week?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
49ersfan Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 47 minutes ago, LETSGOBROWNIES said: Is she drunk/tipsy/been drinking when she’s flirty? She’s always been sober when we talk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malfatron Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 3 hours ago, 49ersfan said: Basically i'm not sure if this woman just has this on/off personality, or if there's actual interest there? I am single and not talking to anyone else so i wonder if i should just rip the bandaid off and give it a shot, and if i should wait for our next meeting or just do it via text. Or should i just move on. maybe shes getting mixed signals from you too. "he flirts with me and then talks about his ex the next day" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vike daddy Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 5 hours ago, cddolphin said: Some women don't want to have to lay it all out from the get-go. She sounds a bit unsure herself. I like the content of the question, but turn it into more of a statement maybe. "We've been hanging out more and I've been enjoying that time, I'd like to get to know you better. Care to blah blah blah later this week?" yeah, that's good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LETSGOBROWNIES Posted March 30, 2018 Share Posted March 30, 2018 6 hours ago, vike daddy said: why not ask her directly, what's wrong with that? something like... "hey, i sort of get mixed signals from you, and i don't know if you'd like to get closer or just stay friends. what do you think?" I agree with vikings daddy, nut up and ask her. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ET80 Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 1 hour ago, LETSGOBROWNIES said: I agree with vikings daddy, nut up and ask her. Texas also agrees. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FinneasGage Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 What'd your text say? She prolly responded that way because that's the vibe you put off man.. You guys sound pretty comfortable, so I'd call and say I wanna hang out with you, can you meet me at wherever whenever? If she says nah she's busy or something like that, just put it back in her court and tell her if she ever wants to get drinks or anything I'd love to sometime. Then ghost her until she hits you back. And if you're at something and both of y'all are there just flirt w/ other girls & ignore her. Imo. That usually works. If that's not working in like 3-4 months just go back to being friends if you wanna cause she's prolly not interested. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vike daddy Posted March 31, 2018 Share Posted March 31, 2018 7 hours ago, jfinley88 said: What'd your text say? She prolly responded that way because that's the vibe you put off man.. You guys sound pretty comfortable, so I'd call and say I wanna hang out with you, can you meet me at wherever whenever? If she says nah she's busy or something like that, just put it back in her court and tell her if she ever wants to get drinks or anything I'd love to sometime. Then ghost her until she hits you back. And if you're at something and both of y'all are there just flirt w/ other girls & ignore her. Imo. That usually works. If that's not working in like 3-4 months just go back to being friends if you wanna cause she's prolly not interested. ugh, bad advice. it just forestalls the lack of knowing what's going on that he wants some resolution on. plus, it's just playing games. why not find out how gals feel, and then make your decisions about moving forward or not on that? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WizeGuy Posted April 3, 2018 Share Posted April 3, 2018 On 3/30/2018 at 11:46 AM, 49ersfan said: So there's this woman i've known for a couple of years, we're not super close but part of the same social circle and see each other every now and then. I've always thought she was hot but in the beginning i didn't get that vibe from her so we've just been friendly, and i've dated other girls. I even went out with one of her friends (only for a single date) which i think she knew about but other than that i never discussed dating life with her. In the last couple of months when our circle meet for dinner/house parties etc, on and off she will be flirting with me. Like one time will be friendly/polite, next time she'll be flirty, next time she'll just be friendly, etc. Last time started friendly but i offhandedly made a comment about my ex (i just broke up with her a few weeks ago). Nothing bad or anything, just a small thing and then back to our conversation. After that she went really flirty, talking about how she knows i like her. When i was leaving she asked me if i was coming back, so i asked her if she will miss me to which she says yep. And when i left she said i was the best. I didn't feel comfortable making a move cuz i low-key have anxiety and i like to be as sure as possible before making a move. Anyways i texted her yesterday and the vibe i was getting was "polite" again, not flirty. Basically i'm not sure if this woman just has this on/off personality, or if there's actual interest there? I am single and not talking to anyone else so i wonder if i should just rip the bandaid off and give it a shot, and if i should wait for our next meeting or just do it via text. Or should i just move on. What advice are you looking for exactly? If you like her, then make a move. Denial isn't nearly as bad as most people make it out to be in their heads. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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