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The Biggest Loser remember when Orca died lol


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I am Tyty and welcome to The Biggest Loser! Nice! Sign up or I’ll never acknowledge you again! You’ll never have this opportunity again! 

So as we all know you are all morbidly obese and are in serious need of weight loss. Literally disgusting. Not a single one of you weigh under 650 pounds which is deeply concerning. I am here as a health guru and excellent host (due to the fact that I am an Internet forum celebrity and hold myself at a higher regard than anyone else on the planet and you all love the heck out of me and stuff). 

You will all be split into 3 parties in which you will convene if you feel like it. You will compete in challenges and this will be one big sarcastic ripoff of malfatron and outpost’s glorious threads. I have not prepared any of the challenges yet and I haven’t really put too much thought into this but I am one of the smartest people in any room at any time so long as I am the only person in said room so I have no doubt I’ll be able to configure this and make it exuberantly fun and stuff for everyone so if you don’t like it **** you 


Frequently asked questions 

“Tyty why are you hosting this when you yourself are fat as hell?”

I currently weigh less than Vernon Davis, **** you

“How similar to the show can you make this?”

Idk I’ve never even seen the show, I’m here to make y’all less fat. It can’t be that hard

“What makes you think you’ll be a good host?”

I’ve been a loser my whole ******* life, brother.


alright sign up now idiot

1. Glenifer

2. FinneasGains

3. Malfweighsaton

4. Pickled ****

5. The Orifice 

6. ObeseFlexin80

7. Dumb

8. TheUnlunchable

9. WingsOnJuan

10. Potsticker

11. Schloppy5djh

12. FedHeavie

13. ThighBingeO2


Edited by Tyty
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Rule 1: being inactive is what got y’all stuck here in the first place. For every day you’re inactive that’s an additional 10 lbs you gain but I probably won’t actually hold you all accountable on it cause I’m lazy

Rule 2: if you hide chocolates under your bed it will really hurt what we are trying to accomplish here

Rule 3: if you edit your post that’s 2 lbs gained 

Rule 4: get your responses in promptly or don’t I don’t really care tbh the slower this goes the less is asked of me


Each contestant weighs 600 pounds, or roughly 75% of the weight of Mission27’s mom. The contests will be scored in such a weigh that contestants can lose and gain weight based on their choices and actions. Whomever loses the most weight wins and lives long enough to die later on from heart failure since they caused too much stress on their body already. There will be three teams and you will all be divided betwixt them evenly. The teams are:

-Beef Supremes

-Tyty’s obese Ex’s

-Tank Bawse’s

Some challenges will be independent and some you will work together. For the independent challenges, the lowest scoring fatty will obviously die, and also the entire fatty army will vote on one person per contest to go out as well because I’m in over my head and also enjoy watching fatties die. 

My next post will be sorting you all into these teams which means by then signups will have locked and everyone else is just a reserve afterward, which is necessary since we all know Glen has already bailed cause he likes to sign up for things and never show up again. 

Then once you’re sorted the first challenge will be up. It’s a simple survey kind of challenge that won’t jiggle your bellies or your brains too badly. 


BEEF SUPREMES (2382 lbs (595.5 avg)):

@Dome—605 lbs

@skywindO2—605 lbs

@Whicker597 lbs

@The Orca — dead af challenge 1 609 lbs

@SwAg —Julius caesared 

TYTY’s OBESE EX’S (1793 lbs (597.6 avg)):

@TedLavie—586 lbs

@ET80dead af challenge 3 611 lbs

@Malfatron— 604 lbs

@FinneasGage—603 lbs

@Glen —dead af challenge 1 609 lbs

TANK BAWSE’s (1189 lbs (594.5 avg)):

@theuntouchable—598 lbs

@kingseanjohndead af challenge 2

@Hockey5djh/orca again—dead af challenge 2 608 lbs

@Pickle Rick—591 lbs

Edited by Tyty
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1 minute ago, Pickle Rick said:

Not sure what this is.  So I'm in 

You’re welcome

1 minute ago, The Orca said:

I'm in...Malf

You’re literally a whale 

Just now, ET80 said:


Yes, oh yes I am in.

Now is not your time.

Thanks dad

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